Farmyard Frolics

Animal rights campaigners may have mixed feelings about a new pressure group in Holland, Sex voor Dieren (Sex for Animals.) While the usual territory of animal rights groups covers protesting about our furry friends being forced to indulge in humanistic behaviour such as smoking and using cosmetics or releasing ferocious predators into the wild to decimate the native population of water voles for no better reason than to stop Naomi Campbell wearing a mink coat, the Dutch are demanding that farm livestock be allowed to have a normal sex life.
Animal breeding on farms is now achieved totally by artificial insemination which is of course very tough on the females. While stallion, bull or boar can at least look forward to forward to a bunk up with a well greased wellie boot, a small part in a porn movie or a hand – job from a Z – list celeb on television. the unfortunate females can never look forward to anything sexier than an encounter with a turkey baster.

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One thought on “Farmyard Frolics

  1. Well they’ve always got nice hard gate posts to back up against I suppose.
    Those Dutch protestors don’t feel sorry for all us poor blokes who have to go through millions of female hoops and tests before we even get a sniff, do they?

    I mean, how DO we chat up women without it being obvious we want to shag them?
    Phaa! I give up.


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