The Talentless Twosome, Ross and Brand

I was going to tear to shreds the shits Wussell Bwand and jonathan Woss today but I see fatsally has already blogged on that topic. Suffice it to say then that Wossy is twenty years past his sell by date and the mostrously unfunny Russell Brand never had a sell by date. His comedy carer should have been condemned and thrown in the skip before some media trendy at BBC television decided to inflict more misery on a world already suffering from a surfeit of self indulgent “comedians.”
Anyone who is thinking of telling me how hilarious Brand is, before you do I’ve fucked your grandaughter. Or Daughter, or wife or mother. Or husband, son etc. See, its not funny at all is it? It’s peurile and insulting just like Brand. Not what you pay your licence fee to hear on television or radio

Wossy’s idea of comedy seems to consist of trying and failing to insult people, telling us, Robbie Williams style, what an enormous knob he has and begging women to have sex with him. (I’ve never forgiven Ross for micking all my original and very funny jokes after a radio show I did a few years ago. C.U. Next Tuesday Jonno.)

Brand’s humour also relies on talking about all te women who have fallen over themselves to have sex with him. The only thing remotely asmusing in this is the irony of our knowing Russell Brand’s sex life is confined to a monomgamous relationship with his right hand.

Others might try to suggest we Boggart Bloggers are old dinosaurs unable to appreciate modern humour. So how’s this for being cruel and insensitive:

Comedy is the hardest job in the world (to echo an old Fast Show sketch) On the other hand suicide is so easy even rock stars can do it.

Russell brand has tried to kill himself several times. If you can’t successfully off yourself Russ how do you ever expect to succeed in making people laugh. (Actually that’s not comedy, it’s cruelty. I hope he reads it :))

Iain Dale – Don’t throw all the blame at Ross and Brand

Paul Waught – Brand, Ross suspended

9 thoughts on “The Talentless Twosome, Ross and Brand

    • Well yeah…but, no…but…

      Since Google tried to swing the emphasis for page rating from inward links to quality content earlier this year we have to grab opportunities to jump on these bandwagons. If, for example, a word or two, say Ross and Brand, appear in our page title or post title and also in the link text of my inward links, that is good SEO optimisation. If I write a piece totally unconnected with the srory but using the keywords, an article about Ross brand frozen foods perhaps, that would also be good.

      But a wonderfully interesting, original, painstakingly researched, well written piece that is not search engine optimised and contains few keywords currently figuring frequently in searches would barely be visible.

      That’s what they call Artificial Intelligence 😦

      Life’s a bitch for bloggers.


      • Keyword optimization… yeah.
        That must be why no one’s run with Cheeky Stoat’s “Dross & Bland”.
        Talent and recognition, those two eternally impossible bedmates hey Ian?


      • I’ve nearly got it cracked at Greenteeth Multi Media Mike. Once I do I’ll be going public – with a place for Mr. Cathead and a menu dedicated to environmental concerns.


  1. I hope this episode forces the management of the BBC to seriously reconsider what the purpose of the organisation is; what it should be doing and what it shouldn’t – and always bare in mind that the licence fee payers are sent to prison if they don’t pay. WE CAN’T PROTEST ABOUT THIS RUBBISH BY REFUSING TO RENEW OUR ‘SUBSCRIPTIONS.’


    • You’re right Lee and Fatsally hits it on the head. Firstly the BBC should not be about ratings, its charter includes a committment to quality; second the corporation as bred a generation of managers who are obsessed with “yoof.” Perhaps this is part of the great dumbing down conspiracy. The yoof audience and the trendy fashionistas are more likely to find something enjoyable because they have been told it is good and fashionable.

      A much more easily manipulated market than people who have been round the block a few times and are capable of making objective judgements.


  2. I can’t stand Ross. Brand can be funny sometimes.
    However, your envy of them both shows clearly in your blathering above. It’s frighteningly transparent. But I fear that Thorpe will never say anything funny at all ; ultimately, ironically, his attempts at humour can only provoke sadness. What a sad man.


    • WOW an amateur psychologist. Youy read one post and you know more about me than I know about myself.

      Except you know nothing about me and even less about the internet and so you only succeed in showing us you are a half wit.

      As I explained to Juzzy the purpose of this post was to cath the zeitgeist and boost my blog traffic. It worked too, I got lots of hits from the keyword optimisation and many people stayed and read more of the hilarious humour on this blog.

      There, now you are so embarrassed you wish I had just deleted your pathetic attempt to insult me.

      No chance. Nemo me impune lacessit.

      C.U. Next Tuesday.


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