It’s Not Over Till The Fat Lady Sings

Well, against all expectations the final F1 race went the distance, indeed apart from the soon-to-retire David Coulthard retiring an hour and three quarters earlier than he intended, having fallen foul of a slithering Nico Rosberg, there was little to keep the non-anorak awake for the first 65 laps, despite the soon-to-retire ITV F1 team talking it up like their jobs depended on it.

But then the rain came.

This wasn’t the first instance of rain to upset proceedings in the finale to the Grands Prix season. Six minutes before the grid was scheduled to set off on the parade lap, just after the fat lady had finished her anthem, (and boy was she statuesque, a good build on her by anybody’s reckoning and her chest was gargantuan. I swear there were at least five shanty shacks nestling under it, unbeknownst to it’s owner) the heavens opened. The track was awash and the organisers decided to delay the start by ten minutes. If they would have had quicker wits they could have just positioned the fat lady’s chest over the start finish straight and set off at the allotted time, but these things generally only come to mind with hindsight.

The rain abated after a few minutes and the race was able to go ahead. Massa streaked off into the lead, Hamilton settled down in fifth place, keeping out of trouble and driving conservatively. Yawn.

Pit stops came and went, Massa consolidated his lead, Hamilton dropped a couple of places and then rather easily overtook the cars in front to maintain station in fourth, one place higher than he needed to finish. Yawn.

Down to the last ten laps and the commentary team were doing their darnedest to do a Murray Walker and engineer some problem for either of the championship contenders, whilst Martin Brundle and Louise were busy doing a rain dance on the roof of the stands.
And YES! it happened, a few spots of rain.

The commentators were beside themselves, would the leaders come in to change tyres or would they stay out and risk losing it all on a slightly damp track?

The rain persisted, they had to come in, but some people had nothing to lose, Jarno Trulli and Timo Glock running down the order. Whilst everybody else dashed into the pits, these two hardy souls stayed out on the track, leapfrogging the pit stoppers and hoping the rain would ease off.

Emerging from the pits Hamilton found himself with the hard charging Grands Prix winner Sebastian Vettel up his exhaust. Hoping their man could catch the twitching Toyota of Glock, McLaren advised Hamilton to let Vettel past.

It aint over till the fat lady sings, and the fat lady had alrady sung. The Ferrari pit went wild, thumping the air, hugging and kissing they watched their man sail across the line to take the chequered flag and the World Championship.

Unfortunately in F1 fat ladies have nothing to do with it, it’s only over when the last car crosses the finish line.

As the rain intensified Glock’s tyres relinquished their grip on the tarmac, twitching and sliding as he crawled into the last corner he was overhauled by the more stable Hamilton, stealing the requisite fifth place and really pissing on Ferrari’s strawberries.

The previously ecstatic crew and family of Felipe Massa switched from delight to disbelief to despondancy in less than five seconds, whilst the Hamilton/McLaren Clan rushed the pit wall, whooping as their man hoiked himself half out of the cockpit to salute the crowd with his rightarm and one finger raised.

A fitting end to a turbulent season and having tried to stay impartial I have to say it, the best man won.

Hubby points out a further bonus, if Hamilton hadn’t won it would have been that dour, chippy Scots tennis player getting the BBC Sports Personality of the Year award without a doubt. Gosh even clear blue skies have a silver lining!

(I actually like Andy Murray)

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One thought on “It’s Not Over Till The Fat Lady Sings

  1. So long as they don’t m,ake Barak Obama the Sports personality of the year.

    Be prepared for a possible surprise in the morning BTW, its a lot closer than the polls predict. The republicans always close in the ast few days of the campaign so the PUMAs (disgruntled Hillary supporters) could make be a major factor in the final count.


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