The Ideal Job – Or Not

Some of us might think being a wine or ber taster or a quality control tester in the johnny factory was the dream job. To someone with a sweet tooth however the job of chief oompah – loompah Sorry I promised myself no Willie Wonka jokes) cholcolate taster must have seemed like a dream coime true.

Not so for forty seven year old Angus Kennedy who had to quit his £30,000-a-year dream job when docors warned his cholesterol level was becoming “dangerously high”.

His work required him to gobble up to 2lbs of weird and wonderful goodies – like cocoa-covered ants and aphrodisiac lollipops – every day.

Manufacturers – including Mars and Nestle – relied on his experience and sophisticated palate to sample new treats ahead of production.

Father-of-five Angus would then write about the products in the trade journal Kennedy’s Confection.

We find this story a tad suspect, in fact when we learned that the chief chocolate muncher’s weight had “ballooned” to thirteen and a half stone in the space of two years we were damn sure it was made up by a committee of bansturbators.

Thirteen and a half stone is not that heavy. In fact compared to the 63 stone teenager we blogged on a few weeks ago Angus is a featherweight. But when you have politically correct idiots out there who can tell Olympic athlete Jessica Ennis she is fat, what chance to normal people have.

We think the banstirbators invented or grossly exaggerated this story as revenge fro the recent news from Australian scientists that eating chocolate is good for us.

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2 thoughts on “The Ideal Job – Or Not

  1. O, perish the thought! I suppose our moral minders believe that chocolate and masturbation are twin evils which make you go blind.
    I’m not a particularly weighty fellow (5.8″ and 12 stone) but the last readout from some putrid little rag told me I was clinically obese. Excuse me while I indulge in my favourite guilty pleasure – sweet chilli crisps dunked in sour cream. Bollocks to the naysayers.

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    • I just don’t know where they get their “ideal weight” figures from; Ethieffingopia?

      I’m about fife feet six and a half, stocky and have always been heavily muscled. I weight twelve and a half stone and still wear thirty four waist trousers.

      It’s official control freakery.

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