Man Drives Dead Girlfriend From Arizona To Detroit (but she was wearing a seatbelt)

Ray Tomlinson (62) took the most bizarre trip of a lifetime when he drove his dead girlfriend, 31-year-old Christine Gilbert,across the USA for 26 hours. Tomlinson will not be facing any charges however, the dead girlfriend was wearing her seatbelt while riding in the passenger seat during the 1,900-mile road trip across the country from Arizona to Michigan, reported WLWT5 on June 6. And apparently under US federal law it is not a crime to transport a stiff in a car so long as as all passengers are wearing seat belts (and so long as the stiff isn’t driving of course)

According to Warren police Deputy Commissioner Louis Galasso, the strange cross country trip ”involved some ‘bizarre’ judgment and behavior, but wasn’t criminal.”

Ray Tomlinson is from Detroit in Michigan and was on a road trip from Arizona to Michigan when his girlfriend Christine died. Christine had been in a mental health facility in the Phoenix area, and when she left there with Tomlinson on Sunday, she was alive.

On Monday, as the couple was driving through the southwest U.S., Tomlinson discovered that his girlfriend’s body was cold. While a toxicology test is still being performed, police suspect that Christine might have taken too much oxycodone. “I went like this, you know, nudged her, at this point in time she was stiff,” said Tomlinson. “There wasn’t jerking or moans or groans, or cries for help, she just fell asleep.”

When Tomlinson discovered that his girlfriend had passed away while being on the road, he checked on what to do about a corpse on his cell phone. Of course, the answer was to take the dead body to a hospital or a morgue, but for Tomlinson the question was to which hospital or morgue.

Even though Tomlinson was in disbelief about his girlfriend’s death, he was determined to do the right thing – which was to get his mom home. “He said he had his 92-year-old, wheelchair-bound mother in the van and wanted to get her home.”

We say the boy do good. Look what happened when Granny Griswald died while on a long road journey in National Lampoon’s vacation …

Athlete’s Feet Cheese Eeeuch and double Eeeeuch

We have reported some weird food innovations on Boggart Blog in the past but this has to be the one that proves food scientists are stark raving bonkers in the head. I mean what kind of insanity must they be infected with to think of using athletes foot bacteria to make cheese.

It gives a whole new meaning to the phrase “that cheese was so ripe it could have walked out of the fridge on its own.”

Move over Stinking Bishop cheese, step asideSurstromming these foul smelling products are no longer contenders. An talking of fowl smelling, even the cheese our daughter brought from France a couple of years ago, that is crusted with chicken crap is sidelined for the title of “world’s stinkiest food.” A pair of scientists from the U.K. recently unveiled a line of cheese products made from bacteria that they gathered from some of the smelliest parts of the human body. The main subjects of an unusual art and science project dubbed “Selfmade,” the cheeses reportedly contained cultured bacteria collected from people’s feet, bellybuttons, armpits. This stuff could be a sexual fetishist gourmet’s delight.

Inspiration for the new cheese came to biologist Christina Agapakis and Sissel Tolaas, a perfume expert, after they spent time contemplating the individual scents and senses of smell of diverse human beings. I suppose they were investigating why we find the stink of our own farts quite pleasant but other people’s repulsive.

To study the disparity between how people react to the microbes normally used to make cheese and the microbes found naturally on the human body (which are in fact very similar), the pair devised a way of combining the two. Would people throw up at the stink of smelly sox but go yum yum on catching a whiff of cheese made from the same person’s athlete’s foot bugs.

“It’s no surprise that sometimes cheese odors and body odors are similar,” Agapakis told Dezeen magazine. “But when we began the project, we were surprised not only by the way cheese and smelly feet share a similar odour but also have similar microbe populations”

She went on to describe how samples were collected from a range of individuals, including artists, scientists, naturalists and even cheese makers (blessed are The Cheesemakers). They then grew cultures from the samples and created a new range of smelly cheeses. These were featured in an exhibition at the Science Gallery in Dublin, Ireland but as yet we have not heard from anybody who has actually eaten them.

“Like the human body, each cheese has a unique set of microbes that metabolically shape a unique odor,” explained the artists about the methodology of their work. “Cheese odors were sampled and characterized using headspace gas chromatography-mass spectrometry analysis, a technique used to identify and/or quantify volatile organic compounds present in a sample.”

Since cheeses tend to take on the unique odors of the microbes used to make them, Agapakis and Tolaas had hoped to essentially mimic this process using human microbes. And they were successful, having created an entire line of cheeses that now serve as literal manifestations of the humans from which they were derived.

The Most Poignant Picture Of The Week

A Russian scientist has published a picture of a soul leaving a body which he claims is the first time this process has been photographed. By coinicidence it was published on the same day as an announcement that in future Google, the greediest, most amoral and control freaky corporation in the world, will be advising the government on internet policy.

So here it is, the soul leaving the body.

human soul leaving the body

The body in question of course is that of British democracy.

And here’s a link for people interested in the real story

dead_bodyparts_online.com

One would think the ordering of furniture online from e-bay would be a low risk venture. Sure, mistakes will sometimes happen and there are some unscrupulous traders who will bill your credit card, make an excuse to delay delivery and the disappear with your dosh. But though such instances my be infuriating they are not really traumatic. Not as traumatic for example as ordering a flat pack table and receiving a stiff or several small parts of one.
Hold hard Boggart, you are thinking, spare us your sick comic fantasies, its nearly dinner time and such a thing could never really happen.
But that is just what happened to Frank and Ludivine Larmande of Grand Rapids Michigan when they ordered a flat pack table from a store that sells through e-bay.
A few days after the order was placed two packages arrived and Frank eagerly began to rip the bubble wrap off the first and said to his wife “this is strange, it looks like a liver.”
Ludivine removed part of the wrapping on the smaller package to reveal part of an ear.
“As soon as we saw that we knew something was not right,” Mrs. Larmande told Grand Rapids Press.
In the circumstances you have to admire her talent for understatement.

NB: The ear and liver, thought to have been culled from a chinese corpse, had been plastinated (preserved in a plastic coating) for use in schools and colleges.