OMFG – Yellowstone Eruption In 2016? Can Shakespeare Help Me?

Thanks to Kelli Shrugs for bringing this to my attention (and to Shakespeare for the prescient lines -scroll down past pic.). The full headline reads:

Yellowstone Eruption In 2016? Shocking New Video Shows What Is Really Going On At Yellowstone

yellowstone-supervolcano-eruption-ash-us
Over the past week, our planet has been hit by large earthquake after large earthquake, and according to Volcano Discovery there are 38 volcanoes around the world that are erupting right now.  We have seen a dramatic spike in global seismic activity that is unlike anything that we have seen in ages, and that is why what is going on at Yellowstone, is so incredibly alarming.  Geologists tell us that a full-blown eruption of the Yellowstone supervolcano would have up to 2,000 times the power of the Mount St. Helens volcanic eruption of 1980, and approximately two-thirds of the country would immediately become uninhabitable.  As you will see below, there are signs that something big is getting ready to happen at Yellowstone, and if it does erupt all of our lives will be permanently changed forever.
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Not being a Bible reading type of person, in times of stress I usually turn to Shakespeare for solace or inspiration. And sure enough I found these lines which helped me understand we cannot change the course of nature and must accept the inevitable.

The night has been unruly: where we lay,
Our chimneys were blown down; and, as they say,
Lamentings heard i’ the air; strange screams of death,
And prophesying with accents terrible
Of dire combustion and confused events
New hatch’d to the woeful time: the obscure bird
Clamour’d the livelong night: some say, the earth
Was feverous and did shake.
(Macbeth, 2.3)

Good old Shaky, always hits the spot.

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Looks Like A Job For …… BICYCLE REPAIR MAN!

One of my favourite Monty Python sketches though it is remembered by few other people which proves either I have an amazing memory or am more of a Python geek than I thought, featured a Superhero called Bicycle Repair Man.

A bike mechanic superhero? you might well ask incredulously. Yes, well the comic premise was that in a world populated by super humans with amazing powers that enabled them to run faster than a speeding train, leap tall buildings at a single bound , fly into space at many times the speed of light and stop the bi-weekly asteroid-on-a-collision-course-with-earth by will power alone; where supershapeshifters who could turn into a tropical rainstorm and douse forest fires, turn into a fiery furnace and evaporate flood waters, fart against the wind and stop a hurricane in it’s tracks (no, sorry – that’s Johnny Fartpants from Viz) or do any miraculous deed that was necessary to save the world averted catastrophe on a dally basis.

The only things these superheroes could not do apart from
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Government By Fear And Panic

Gordon Brown has been using the tactics of government by fear and panic to try to swing public opinion behind the treaty he will propose at the big expensive jolly for world leaders in a foreign city >:XX sorry, I mean climate summit in Copenhagen. At this jolly old booze up the great and good will get together and decide how to save the planet from the threat posed by global warming.

We do not know what proposals Gordon’s agenda will put forward but you can bet it will not include a pledge by world leaders to desist from flying off round the world to attend jollies every few weeks.

A speech Mr. Brown gave over the weekend might give us a few clues though. He told his audience if the world does not back the Copenhagen Treaty millions of people will die as governments shoot dissenters :> or from flood, famine, plague, killer heatwaves, drought, late pizza deliveries as all sorts of catastrophes take their toll. Nobody will be immune, even politicians will be likely to choke to death when saying “anthropogenic” instead of “man made”.

Boggart Blog wants to ask you Mr. Brown, these natural disasters – will they be in any way similar to the Swine Flu pandemic that was going to have wiped out 450% of the human population by now unless we all trooped off to get our vaccine shot? Or has the pandemic put itself on hold because the vaccine was not ready in time? Or is it like the Bird Flu epidemic a few years ago that was going to wipe us out and in the end here in Britain killed one rather elderly sea bird?

And what about the AIDS epidemic of the 1980s. Remember back they were telling us the virus would be carried in air by 1990 and we would be able to catch HIV just by looking at a bare naked lady or even a lady in her underwear unless we wore a decontamination suit? Will your predicted catastrophes of your be like any of those Mr. Brown?

And what about the killer heatwaves? Will they be like the Barbecue Summer we were promised this year, or the Barbecue Autumn we were supposed to get last week? I sat in the garden every day with my sausages and burgers and a cool box full of tinnies, I wore my hat with corks round the brim and I froze my bollocks off.

The trouble with trying to control people through fear and panic you see Gordon is it will work very well once, not quite so well the next time and the third time will just attract scepticism. Your government, Gordon, tries the fear and panic stratagem about three times a week. It is any wonder nobody ever believes a word you say.

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