Still on the subject of Ukraine – meet Barbieboushka

Ukranian model Valeria Lukyanova is a real person. you may find this hard to believe when you see the picture below, but honestly she is.

My wife is a big fan of a late night TV show called bodyshocks, in which ex model Katie Piper who was the target of an acid attack and has had to undergo many operations to rebuild her face, talks to people about cosmetic surgery disasters, faces and other body bits ruined not by violence but by that futile quest for physical perfection that obsesses so many young people these days.

Katie deals very sympathetically with cases where cosmetic surgery has gone wrong or highly visible but highly misguided tattoos. But the results of cosmetic surgery that has gone right can be just as insane.

Valeria Lukyanova - barbiesboushka?
Picture: Valeria Lukyanova. Source kwikwee.com

Just one question. WTF was she thinking?
The same thing perhaps as the deluded revolutionaries in Ukraine, Egypt, Yemem and Syria who believed Obama would actually help them in more substantial ways than by making a speech.

In fact Valeria believes she is an alien and can live on light and air. Which explains a lot and answers for us a question relating to the insanity of the new rulers of western Ukraine who believe they can win a fight with Russia.

The entire country is insane.

Anti Ageing Properties of Any Old Gloop Scientifically Proved.

On seeing in the news today that began with the words Boots’ anti-ageing treatment my first reaction was to turn the page and look for something funny in the Swine Flu coverage. A product to keep boots in pristine condition is probably very welcome to some people but I wear trainers and would have no use for it.

Something caught my attention tough and I started to read. The item turned out to be a follow up to a story from a couple of years ago that covered the claim of Boots Chemists for a skin treatment. The old story covered a claim by Boots that their anti ageing cream did actually improve the condition on users skin rather than just filling in the cracks.

Most people respond to such claims by cosmetic manufacturers with a sceptical Yeah, right. The scientific community however got their knickers in a right old twist about this particular claim. They’re so precious, so Graham Norton at times.

“The tests on the product were unscientific,” whined the academic whiners with their PhDs in whining from Whining College, Whinebridge, “the tests were not scientifically founded by scientists using science.” What they meant was the tests had not been carried out using a double blind placebo controlled sample group and all the usual claptrap.

Well Boots went away and got some other scientists to do some placebo controlled tests using a sample of 80 people aged between 45 and 80. The results came back and … … … boots were right. According to the scientific results of the scientific tests carried out by scientists the stuff does work. 43% of people using the genuine cream reported an improvement in the state of their skin against only 22% reporting an improvement in the placebo group.

The scientists concluded that 21 % of people using the proper stuff experienced a benefit. That’s 2 out of 10, which in the class fatsally teaches would definitely not earn a gold star especially if you apply scientific rigour and conclude that 22% of people were slapping on any old gloop and still got a benefit.

What this proves in the eyes of Boggart Blogs nasty, suspicious journalists is:

a) Scientists might be very clever at science but they are not good at basic sums.
b) While only 2 out of 10 got a result from using proper stuff, 4 out of 10 saw improvement from sticking any old gloop on so long as someone told them it was doing them good.

This is, is it not, exactly the kind of science used by charlatans, hucksters, con artists, snake oil salesmen, bunco merchants and cosmetics manufacturers for centuries. Clearly it is more scientific than science.

More humour every day at Boggart Blog

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Mentalist Of The Week.

There was a guy on breakfast television yesterday who has had his whole body tattooed with Tiger markings. Tattooed, you understand, no wussy face paint job for him, nothing that would wash off or even fade with time. Face and body tiger-striped all over. What is more he’s had cosmetic surgery to mouth and nose to give his face a more tigerlike aspect.

The man, let’s call him Tiger Man is an American and is in Britain on a promotional tour. Promoting what? you might well ask. Insanity is a strong possibility. He complained to Phillip Schofield, not perhaps the best choice of interviewer as he had trouble keeping his face straight when dealing with oddballs, that on arriving at Heathrow he had been detained by security for four hours although he had no criminal convictions and no terrorist connections. We think it was simply to give the boys on afternoon shift a chance to get a look. You can imagine the texts going out, “gt in a bit rly n brng mobile or cmcrdr, got a rite nutter here. Boyz down the pub wll never believe this.”

Tiger man’s best mate, who was with him, had had his face and body tattooed all over with yellow and green lizard scales. He had also had his toungue divided and insisted on demontrating lizard like tongue gymnastics to camera. Put me right off my Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes it did.
These people claim they are simply expressing their right to free expression. I say, and I know I’ve said it before, I’ll expect tp say it again too; When they closed down the mental hospitals and decided to let people like this loose, they had not really thought things through.

New humour every day from Boggart Blog

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As out hit count falls away its time to start the daily web grab again. here are some of the blogs we commented on today.

You Spin Me Round A witty observation from Iain Dale on the Labour Party Head Offices Music On Hold – and an even wittier comback from Boggart Blog

Naughtie Wishes Dems Good Luck BBC Radio 4 News jockey James Naughtie wished a leading US Democrat “Good Luck” Guido Fawkes sees this as a sign of BBC bias towards the Democrats in the US election. But maybe he was wishing them good luck with a much bigger issue – see the next item.

Obama Served With Elegibility Action Rumours about barak Obama not being a natural born Amertican and thus not elegibie to run for President have been around for some time. But now lawyer and foirmer State of Virginia District Attorney Phillip Berg has filed a suit calling for Obama to prove his elegibility. Interesting.

Convention of the living dead Journalists and bloggers who have drunk the Obama Kool Aid or been sucked into the maelstrom of hysteria are writing as if the election is over. It would be if the Democrats had a half competent candidate.

John McCain Look behind You Who is that looming threateningly over Johnny Mac like nemesis. No its not Barak Obama, its George W Bush