A Better Class Of Prime Minister

As I have nothing better to post today I’m going to pass on this quote from London councillor Nigel Fletcher commenting on Big Society Dave’s efforts at the EU Summit:

The Prime Minister says he “hit the phones” at EU summit yesterday. A nice change from the last Prime Minister, who used to hit people with phones.

Enjoy. It made me laugh.

More humour every day at Boggart Blog

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Papering Over The Cracks at G20

Babygate

Our congratulations go out to Dave and Sam Cam on the unexpected arrival of their little bundle of joy. Dave will obviously now be cancelling the rest of his holiday so he can take his paternity leave and then he can have his holiday after he returns to work.

But I have to confess I am a little puzzled concerning media reporting of the event.

The press said that Dave took Sam to hospital when she went into labour and that he had stated, “The baby just popped out.”

However it was also reported that Sam had a C-section.

So, excuse me if you are eating your tea, if you have a C-section they make an incision in the abdomen and hoik the baby out of the womb.

If, on the other hand, the baby ‘just pops out’, it is highly likely that the baby is delivered with reasonable ease through the birth canal.

This leads me to be the first hack to coin the term Babygate and wonder just where exactly Dave was whilst Sam was having an epidural and being opened up like a tin of baked beanz.

Was he really at her bedside, gowned and masked, holding her hand whilst he peered over the screening sheet as a surgeon fumbled around inside her, or was he in fact wetting the baby’s head down the Dog and Duck with a few close mates and loads of people he’d never seen before, handing out cigars and shouting “The drinks are on me!”

(Our own happy event is expected imminently after which Ian will be taking Grandpa-ternity leave and I will be holding the fort in my newly acquired Great Auntyness.)

*A golden opportunity there Cleo and Bro Bastion, to say that I was always a great aunty.

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Cameron Gets His Nudger Out

Cameron’s Big Society

So David Cameron wants us to become a big society?

Does that mean as part of the NHS cuts we can wave goodbye to all those paronizing, multi million pound advertising campaigns warning us about the dangers of fast food and obesity and telling how much our greedy self indulgence costs the health service.

I mean, if the Prime Minister wants a big society how big does he want us? Bring on the curries, pizzas, pie and chips, happy days are here again.

If I Could Rule The World

All over the news today is the big story that The Sun has withdrawn its support for the Labour Government. I’ll bet this has come as a major blow. Talk about shitty little rats leaving the sinking ship. (We are assured that this is nothing at all to do with the fact that the Tories’ head of communications is a former editor of the News of the World, in case you were about to accuse them of such a thing.)

Now, I’m not saying the Labour Government is faultless, but realistically, can anyone see David Cameron making a good Prime Minister? Seriously? He’s featureless, characterless, weak, wet, vacant, incapable of basic human emotions and whenever he opens his mouth, I go into a trance that instantly erases his words as nothing he says stays in my mind.

David reminds me of an early Spitting Image puppet of John Major, who was actually a robot being controlled by Old Maggie. (She could still be behind this one, the age and ill-health appearance could be a ruse to keep you looking the other way.)

I feel for Gordon, its like he wandered into the wrong room accidentally and has been left to clean up the shit. Tony was good. Tony was in the right place at the right time and used it to his full advantage. Tony connected with the people, made them believe that he really cared, then legged it while the going was still good. Gordon seemed like the only willing candidate to step up and try to fix it. But, alas, it was probably too late, as is often the case this late in any governments’ term.

But Governments are not there to be liked. It would be no fun if everybody loved the Government, if everyone was eternally happy with their life, and people were Conga-ing in post offices, supermarkets and dole offices across the land (actually, that might be fun every once in a while!)

Following Gordon’s speech yesterday, people are commenting about various things, including how many times he used the words change, fight, and values. In the Star Wars movies, the line ‘I have a bad feeling about this’ is used by nearly all the characters at various points, but it doesn’t take away any merit from the film. It is a line that I feel will be spoken many times over should we wake up to find David Cameron in control come June next year.

Voting in a new Tory Government next year will not make things better, it will just start a whole load of new shit. The rich will get richer, the poor will get poorer, the ill will be left to die unless they can pay a premium for treatment and the BNP will flourish further. In fact, why not go one step further, and vote BNP. Let Nick Griffin take the helm. Isolate Great Britain completely and let us sink into a dark and lonely existence.

Everyone needs to use their vote next June, it does affect us all and we will all pay for those missing votes. Vote for Gordon, Vote for Cleggy, Vote Green, Vote for ANYBODY but David (or the BNP, but if you vote BNP you are probably not intelligent enough to use the internet and be reading this). You know it makes sense.

Forward to the past

A big welcome to new Conservative leader David Cameron, if only because an old Etonian is bound to be an absolute gift for satirists. Mr Cameron talks of caring Conservatism and of being in touch with the voters but if you asked him “how should one ensure savings are secure” would he not reply ” Ay, thet is say simple, jast leave one’s funds in the famlay trast.”
But it is comforting in a way to know that the Conservatives are once more led by a wealthy and privileged patrician. There is a kind of warm feeling coming out of Westminster, generated by the knowledge that traditional values are not lost. Why, before you know it we will be having a Labour leader who used to work in a coal mine…