Even before Gordon Brown had finished his Im going to step down as PM and party leader, not now but at some time in the future, maybe, unless I have to step up and save the country speech his wannabe successor David Milliband, Thunderbirds puppet lookalike and the senior half of pop politics duo Deadward, was pushing himself forward as a potential replacement and candidate for the leadership election. Milliband has many obvious weaknesses but is current favourite to succeed Brown.
So who are the contenders hoping to stop him? Boggart Blog give you a rundown of all the likely candidates, their strengths and weaknesses.
David Milliband ( Thunderbirds Puppet)
For: Admired by party elite, left wing intelligentsia and the Islington metrosexual set.
Against: Hes a cunt.
Supporters: Tony Blair, David Milliband, The Conservatives
Most likely to: Bottle it
Least likely to: Appeal to labour voters
Ed Balls ( Mr. Bollocks)
For: Not a lot
Against: Everybody hates him
Supporters: Gordon Brown
Most likely to: Deny ever knowing Gordon Brown
Least likely to: Win
Alan Johnson (Real Nowhere Man)
For: Has few enemies
Against: Billy no mates
Supporters: Unions and grassroots members
Most likely to: Say Howay the lads and down a pint of Newcastle Brown
Least likely to: Eat quiche
Ed Milliband (Harry Potter lookalike)
For: Is not called David, does not look like Thunderbirds puppet
Against: Cant do magic
Supporters: Mostly under twelve
Most likely to: Point wand at Tories and say Expelliamus
Least likely to: Be recognised by members of the public
Harriet Harperson (He face turns men to stone)
For: Will get the feminist vote
Against: Inspires fear and loathing in creatures with testicles
Supporters: Mostly in prison for murder
Most likely to: Demand more female and ethnic minority MPs
Least likely to: Offer Boris Johnson a tuppeny upright
Peter Mandelson (He flies by night)
For: Hes from the dark side
Against: Not eligible (but that did not stop Barack Obama)
Supporters: The undead
Most likely to: Put the bite on David Cameron
Least likely to: Increase death duties
And now over to the Boggart Blog bookie:
Current favourite is David Milliband but he has drifted out fron 6/4 to 2/1.
There is steady support for AlanJohnson at 5/1
Ed Balls in 7/1 but if his wife runs as his deputy leader you can get 500/1 on the forecast.
Harriet Harperson badly needs some support at 25/1 but the steamer in the early betting is Ed Milliband in from 33/1 after the election to 8/1 on the exchanges this morning.
And a late springer in the market, you could have got any price you wanted on Saturday, he was quoted at 250/1 on Sunday but this morning the professional punters are snapping up 10/1, it’s Tony Blair. Get on the comeback kid thile there’s a bit of value left.
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