Confiscate The Right’s Wealth But Not Mine Says Millionaire Leftie

In her column in The Guardian today, hand wringer and bleeding heart in chief Polly Toynbee, the multimillionairess who lives in a mansion in West London and has holiday homes in Cornwall and Tuscany wrote:

To end this impasse [ in the Euro zone ], let us tap Europe’s vast wealth. Faced with a crisis almost as grave as war, social democrats must act in concert to end the toxic policies of austerity. [ … ]

Abolishing tax havens, co-ordinating fair tax instead of destructive competition, ending secrecy of wealth and property ownership: politically hard decisions are easier if social democrats can inspire people with the value of standing together, not falling apart.

Knowing something of how tax efficiently Polly, and her employers Guardian Media, use tax havens to protect their vast wealth from the attentions of the taxman I had to reply thus:

So when you, dear Pol, and all the other obscenely wealthy left wing elitists put your spare homes on the market and maybe even sell your main home, the London mansion and trade down to a modest two bed apartment, what do you think will happen to property prices in Tuscany, The Dordogne, Cornwall and the fashionable suburbs of London.

Same goes for art treaures and antiques and shares in all those ethical investments when the elitist left all dissolve their trust funds.

I’m not holding my breath waithing for it to happen of course.

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Confiscate The Right’s Wealth But Not Mine Says Millionaire Leftie

In her column in The Guardian today, hand wringer and bleeding heart in chief Polly Toynbee, the multimillionairess who lives in a mansion in West London and has holiday homes in Cornwall and Tuscany wrote:

To end this impasse [ in the Euro zone ], let us tap Europe’s vast wealth. Faced with a crisis almost as grave as war, social democrats must act in concert to end the toxic policies of austerity. [ … ]

Abolishing tax havens, co-ordinating fair tax instead of destructive competition, ending secrecy of wealth and property ownership: politically hard decisions are easier if social democrats can inspire people with the value of standing together, not falling apart.

Knowing something of how tax efficiently Polly, and her employers Guardian Media, use tax havens to protect their vast wealth from the attentions of the taxman I had to reply thus:

So when you, dear Pol, and all the other obscenely wealthy left wing elitists put your spare homes on the market and maybe even sell your main home, the London mansion and trade down to a modest two bed apartment, what do you think will happen to property prices in Tuscany, The Dordogne, Cornwall and the fashionable suburbs of London.

Same goes for art treaures and antiques and shares in all those ethical investments when the elitist left all dissolve their trust funds.

I’m not holding my breath waithing for it to happen of course.

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How Did We Manage In The Old Days

Back when I was footloose and fancy free the majority of my peers managed to conduct entirely satisfactory sexual relationships without the comfort of their parents’ roof over their heads.

It’s not like it is today where my generation tend to be quite tolerant and understanding of our offsprings’ raging hormones and their need to satisfy certain urges, especially when they are in a relationship.

How times have changed!

Indeed even after middle brother got married, when they visited the parental home the new Mrs. T. shared my bedroom while he slept downstairs on the sofa. Well for the first two years anyway.

And I can’t recall the number of snogs that were interrupted by my Dad just going to get a glass of water, when the sitting room was at the opposite end of the house to the kitchen!

But as I say, and I’m sure readers of a similar age will concur, we managed;)

So this weekend we were scheduled to be off down in Newbury for a friend’s birthday.

However SezJez came down with one of her bouts of tonsilitis. We pander to her every whim and tell her to keep taking the paracetamol in the hope that it will pack up and leave, but, as happens about 1 in 4 times, it digs its heels in and she ends up ill enough for the doctors to prescribe anti bs. So it was yesterday that we decided she really wasn’t well enough to be left on her own, or to the tender mercies of her big brother, so the weekend was cancelled.

BBC went ballistic! She wasn’t really ill, she didn’t need us to stay, she could go to her boyfriend’s etc etc.

We were a bit bemused at the strength of the reaction and the unreasonableness, but then it turns out he’d a little soiree pour deux chez nous planned and now he’d have to call it off.

Aw diddums. They sure have life too easy these days. Does he not realise how lay – byes got their name?

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Are We Becoming A Nation Of Cat Swingers.

Last week a report on Britain’s housing crisis , highlighting the unfit-for-purposeness of many new build “starter homes” quoted details of an offering from one well known house builder. We will not name and shame them because the rest are as bad and anyway if we’re going to get sued we want it to be for insulting some pseudo – celebrity or accusing a well know politician of taking backhanders from Colonel Gadaffi. The “home” in question featured living room of just 3m x 3m. Assuming there is a door that makes fitting in a sofa, spare chair and a tele impossible.

An investigative reporter from one of the national newspapers decided to put to the test the old phrase “not enough room to swing a cat.” by actually swinging a cat (he said it was a stuffed toy and we believe him don’t we?) in the deceptively spacious living room. Taking a firm grip on his cat’s tail he started to spin, arms outstretched. Long before he reached getting dizzy and falling over speed the cat’s head was bashing against the walls.

So with such restricted living space the dwelling cannot by any stretch of the cat … I mean imagination, be referred to as a starter home for a young family – or a cat lover. Ideal for agoraphobic perhaps…

Someone is bound to remind us the phrase “not enough room to swing a cat” refers not to a furry faced quadruped but a cat o’ nine tails, the knotted whip favoured by Victorian magistrates and their heavies, also by dominatrices who cater to senior judges, top ncivil servants and Tory MPs. So as well as being inadequate for young families or couples and cat lovers the houses are no god for people with an interest in S & M fun either. No wonder the Conservative Party housing spokesman is calling for radical changes in housing policy.

It is not just the living room that is teeny and cramped. Though the dining – kitchen contains a ceramic hob and a combined oven and grill it does not contain enough space for even a small table and four chairs. in fact there is hardly enough room to stand between the hob and work surface on one side and the “breakfast bar” (shelf) and sink on the other. Dinner parties are out then? No worries, the lucky mortgage owners will be so busy working at three jobs to pay the mortgage they will have no time for a social life.

In the starter home offering from different builder the sleeping area has another feature sure to appeal to those lacking a social life. The toilet is in the bedroom. What massive kudos that must gain the houseowner the first time one invites a new lover to sleep over.

What is really puzzling is people are buying these “starter homes” for over £100k. In Accrington you can still get a two up two down terrace with upstairs bathroom and toilet and a downstairs “deceptively spacious guest toilet” (OK, it’s at the end of the yard) for less that £50k. With sex and drugs available on the streetcorner, now that’s what I call gracious living.

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Senior Conservative Claims Dog Food On Expenses.

The details of MP’s dodgy expenses claims continue to land on the Boggart Blog News Desk 24 hours a day. Our reporters are on round the clock alert to bring you up to the minute information. The latest expose we hear is the story of a senior Conservative MP, Shadow Welsh Secretary Cheryl Gillan who claimed on her second home expenses for dog food.

Boggart Blog’s insider at conservative Central Office informs us that while the party’s official line is no rules have been broken but Ms. Gillan has agreed to get a dog.

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Revolution In Home Insulation – Baby Poo

Our desperation to reduce pollution and cut the amount of carbon pollutants we pump into the atmosphere is leading to the development of some highly creative, even bizarre solutions.
Home insulation materials made with baby poo for example.
Canadian recycling specialist Knowaste is to open the UK’s first disposable nappy recycling facility near Birmingham. The plant will recycle about 30,000 tonnes of shitty, well soaked disposable nappies per year. This represents approximatelt 4% of the total nappy filling capacity of the UK baby population.
The initiative will help Britain meet an E.U. imposed target for reducing the amount of waste sent to landfill sites. While Government scientists have praised the venture, independent environmentalists express reservations.
Removing nappyfill from landfill is a step forward said a spokesman for Greenpoo, but it is not a long term solution. The real answer is to produce less waste and with luck the global food crunch will help towards that.
Undaunted, Knowaste has announce pland to extend its recycling operation to take in adult incontinence products too.
Poo based insulation panels and lagging will be available by the end of the year but their use in the building of new homes has met a distict lack of enthusiasm from the construction industry.
Speaking on behalf of property developers, Mr. S. Melly-Holmes CEO of Construction Redevelopment And Projects Ltd. asked “do these tossers not think the housing market is in enough shit already?”

Are We Becoming A Nation Of Cat Swingers If your dream home does not have room to swing a cat will there be enough space for baby poo insulation panels.