It’s not what you think

Many years ago everybody’s favourite schoolma’am Esther Rantzen had a spot in her weekly TV show That’s Life in which she would produce misshapen vegetable which were usually vaguely rude. This was hugely amusing for the kind of people who watched That’s Life (if you don’t know the show think of Reader’s Digest on Vallium,) and who though bottom was such a filthy word they’d say derriere when referring to somebody’s arse.

Well here’s a pic I stumbled on at which will amuse the most vulgar of us but might make the people who have derrieres rather than arses blush.

Who would post a picture like that and why? you might well ask. Sorry I don’t know, it was posed anonymously, maybe in an attempt to prick our collective conscience about the plight of flood victims.

More humour and satire



And the Oscar goes to

It’s that weekend again when the MKultra factory that is Hollywood gathers it population of the talentless, the retarded, the cosmetically reconstructed and the generally useless so they can all congratulate each other on being “simply wonderful dahling.”

This year the name of the little statuettes could have been changed to the POScars as POS is the hands down winner of the TLA of the year award.

So which Piles Of Shit deserved to wing and which didn’t?

12 Years A Slave was predictable winner of best film because it is about black people being treated badly by white people. (There is only one thing the Hollywood glitterati are more addicted to that botox, fame, cocaine, prescription drugs and publicity and that is guilt. Pity the tossers are so shameless about passing of utter shite as art.) 12 Years A Slave is supposedly a true story. Well it’s true that the central character was a real person, a free black man who was kidnapped and sold into slavery. Less likely is that the aforementioned central character spen his twelve years of slavery being flogged, tortured and humiliated (along with his very attractive girlfriend) in order to provide the script for a soft porn, SMBD blackxploitation movie.The plantation owners were businessmen, they didn’t invest money in slaves for their mates to have fun, they wanted workers. It was often written by contemporary chroniclers that slaves were in some ways better off than the free poor. If you were free nobody cared if you starved, if someone had invested money in you, they were going to feed you.

The second most prestigious award,the POScar for best director when to a POS titled Gravity. This was the picture that most blatantly targeted the kind of geeks who watch Star trek thinking it is a fly on the wall documentary. Gravity is idiotic in every way, ’nuff said.

Disney Studios won the POScar for best animated film for a POS that is exactly like every other Disney animation, sentimental, mawkish, cutesy pie drivel.

Best Actor POScar went to Matthew McConaughey for playing the role of a man who helped HIV positive people buy illegal drugs legally. If these people were HIV positive you’d think there’s a good chance they would have had enough of illegal drugs. McConaughey’s acceptance speech however suggested he had personally tested the drugs his character was supplying.

There was one other award worth noting. The Oscar for best psychotic killer of the year went to some guy name Pistorius.

Twelvth night smile

Twelveth Night everyone – and a reminder that it is now only 355 days until we have to do it all again. Not many parties tonight I guess as it is Sunday, but I thought we could finish the holiday with a smile.

Someone sent me this picture that made me laugh. Nothing to do with Chistmas (for which we are eternally grateful, but it made me laugh. OK I know I have a sick sense of humour but … give it a chance.

Merry non Christmas everyone. Have a good one.

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