Sus Sexit? Queen agrees to a transition period for Harry & Duchess of Meghan

Boggart Blog and other Greenteeth Digital Publishing websites do not often report on the Royal family, the main contributors are reluctant Royalists because, as editor Ian puts it, when yu think of the havoc ‘President’ Thatcher or ‘President’ Blair could have caused without the restraining effects of The Crown it shows how valuable The Monarch can be without their actually doing anything.

But as there is a major crisis going on, we thought we’d better stick our oar in along with the rest.

Senior members of the Royal Family are holding emergency talks on Monday to discuss the future of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex after the couple caused the crisis when they announced last week that they would step down from their roles as front line of the family.


The Queen at Buckingham Palace with Grandsons William and Harry and sons Charles and the paedophile prince (allegedly) Andrew Source: Zero Hedge

Prince Charles cut short an engagement in Oman and flew back to attend the conference, held at Sandringham, the Queen’s private estate in Norfolk. Also in involved will be the Queen, William, and Harry and various aides and constitutional experts, while The Duchess of Meghan is expected to join them via a video link from Canada, where she is flew las week with young Archie, having insulted The Queen, The British nation and The Duchess of Kate and pissed off all the people in Britain that her arrogant, self – righteous, attention seeking attitude and her blatant invocation of the race card when she wasn’t getting what she wanted had not already pissed off.

An insider has told The Times that the pair both feel “tethered” by their responsibilities, which incuded the onerous duty of being expected to be nice to common people. The source added that the couple regarded themselves as having been pushed away by what they saw as a bullying attitude from the Duke of Cambridge. These claims have been strongly contested by sources close to the Cambridges, as well as some close to Prince Harry.

“She wants to leave,” the source said of the duchess. It is well known this Californian airhead and third rate actress believed she would be granted the title “Princess,” despite being told that as a divorcee that would not be the case.

Poor dear, someone should have told her the British monarchy is real life not fucking Disneyland.

“Harry has been under intense pressure to choose. It is sad. He loves the Queen. He loves this country. He loves all his military stuff. I think it will genuinely break his heart to leave. I don’t think that’s what he really wants. I think they want some halfway house.” –The Times

Phil The Greek is reported to have advised his grandson, “It is perfectly acceptable to step out with actresses but one does not marry them.”

Couldn’t have put it better.

Prince William, meanwhile, has expressed “sadness” over the strained relations between House Cambridge and House Sussex, telling the Times that the royal family was no longer “a team.”

“I’ve put my arm around my brother all our lives and I can’t do that any more; we’re separate entities,” William – the Duke of Cambridge, reportedly told a friend.

Harry says they want to be financially independent and no longer wish to receive taxpayer money. Possibly unconnected but Harry was seen touting his wife’s talents as a voiceover artist (voicing a Princess character maybe,) to Disney CEO Bob Iger.

Observers say the couple is likely to generate income from a UK trademark from their brand, ‘Sussex Royal,’ which they applied for in June – along with sponsorships and speaking tours.

According to the Times, senior royal officials – including secretaries, press advisers and Sir Michael Stevens who handles royal finances, have been locked in talks for two days to work out various solutions to discuss on Monday.

The alternatives will cover central issues such as how much work the couple will carry out for the royal family and where they will live.

The Sussexes hope to divide their time between Britain and Canada but their current residence, Frogmore Cottage, Windsor, is among the topics on the table. The residence was controversially renovated for at least £2.4 million at taxpayers’ expense. The couple are said to be prepared to give that up, although it is possible that they will remain there but pay a commercial rent.

The question of how much royal work they carry out may have an impact on the extent to which the Prince of Wales continues to fund them with the money he receives from the Duchy of Cornwall. –The Times Some reports suggest Prince Charles is determined to cut the purse strings. Some sources maintain Charles advised his son against the marriage, not because he disliked Megan but because he doubted that an actress from ‘woke’ California would cope with the constraints of life as a member of the Royal family.

Latest reports from the Royal household suggest that following  “constructive discussions,” the Queen has agreed to a “period of transition” for Harry and Meghan.

“Although we would have preferred them to remain full-time working Members of the Royal Family, we respect and understand their wish to live a more independent life as a family while remaining a valued part of my family,” wrote the Queen, acknowledging that her grandson and his wife want to live more independent lives, according to the Washington Post.

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The Sun Says Queen Supports BREXIT. Cameron furious.

Government sources were quick to deny reports published in The Sun suggesting that Queen Elizabeth had expressed her disapproval of the political direction the EU is taking and said she hopes we vote to leave.

So how does The Queen really feel about her country becoming a province of Federal Europe? Here is the truth summed up in a single picture.

COMPETING QUEENS
Her Maj. Queen Elizabeth II of Britain, world champion Game Of Thrones player puts one of the pretenders, Angela Merkel of Germany, in her place.
The speech bubbles didn’t work too well on the freebie photo editor I was using (for the sake of speed), but you get the message.

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Election Shock: The Queen Campaigns For UKIP?

Campaign managers for the mainstream parties must have been taken aback to see UKIP’s latest recruit canvassing for the KIPpers candidate in Bromley, South London. HRH Queen Elizabeth II is not supposed to take part in political events, the constitution requires that the Royal family maintain strict impartiality.

But why would Her Maj not support UKIP, after all the party does stand up for the sovereignty of the nation she is sovereign of.

Actually nobody is saying whether the lookalike is a UKIP supporter or just a local woman who had popped down the shops for some gin and ciggies and grabbed a few leaflets to use as kindling for her Easter barbecue.

Craziest Conspiracy Theory Ever – Is Boggart Blog To Blame?

There are conspiracy theories and there are ‘conspiracy theories’. While we like the conspiracy theories that seem whacky but will one day be revealed as truth (i.e. Big Pharma and The Government are conspiring to make us take useless drugs like aspirin for the sole purpose of swelling corporate profits), others are not really about conspiracies but rather are the ravings of nutters.

Of the latter type, probably the craziest is the one that claims members of Europe’s old aristocracies including our own Royal Family, along with wealthy bankers and financiers are members of a satanic cannibal cult. Our Dear Old Queen (God bless her) a cannibal? Utterly ludicrous.

So where did anyone get an insane notion such as this:

European Royals Killing Naked Children For Fun At Human Hunting Parties?

This is one in a series of articles taken from eyewitness testimony before the International Common Law Court of Justice in Brussels. Five international judges are examining evidence of child rape, torture, murder and kidnapping allegedly done by global elite members of the Ninth Circle Satanic Child Sacrifice Cult network. Regular Ninth Circle child sacrifices were said to take place in the catacombs of Catholic Cathedrals, the Vatican, on private estates and groves and government military bases in Belgium, Holland, Spain, Australia, Ireland, France, England and the US. At least 34 child mass grave sites were identified in Ireland, Spain and Canada – and refused excavation by the respective governments, Crown of England and Catholic Church. Named as present in Ninth Circle activities were Pope Francis, former Pope Ratzinger;Anglican, United Church of Canada and Catholic Church officials including Cardinals; members of European royalty including Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip; officials of the Canadian, Australian, UK and US military and governments including the USA’s CIA, plus prominent government ministers, judges, politicians and businessmen from the US, Belgium, Holland, Canada, Australia, France, Ireland and the UK.

Teens were drugged, stripped naked, raped, hunted down in the woods and killed by European royals according to this week’s latest eyewitness to testify before the International Common Law Court of Justice in Brussels. The woman was the fourth eyewitness to give accounts about these human hunting parties of the global elite Ninth Circle Satanic Child Sacrifice Cult network. A former member of the Netherlands criminal drug syndicate known as Octopus testified that victims were obtained for these human hunting parties from juvenile detention centers in Belgium and Holland.

See what we mean, totally insane. unfortunately we have to hold up our hands and admit that the idea of the elite hunting humans might have come from this blog. Back in 2009 one of our contributors produced a recording on what he claimed was the real Queen’s speech, the things the monarch wanted to say before she was censored by politicians. And we would never question the integrity of our contributors.

Here’s an extract from a transcript of the original recording made by Her Maj. created using voice to text software (so some of the spellings are phonetic)

“Do you knay subjects and lackeys, evereah yeah I hev to say all this shite about policies and plans? who writes this nonsense. Renewable energeagh, tax cuts, its the same evereagh yeah and nothing changes. If this is mai Government like what it is supposed to be, I’m heving mai ideas made law. I want something done abite the ban on fox hunting. And I don’t want that miserable fakker Brine as Prime Ministair anaygh mare, I quaite liked Bleagh, his ears were rartheagh amusing, they took on a life of their own when he became excited. But Brine is miserable, he hates Corgis and his wife does not hev a comedy mithe.”

“Nigh Ay’m the Queen and ay do not care for the way things are being done. Fairstleah, Ay want a proper Prime Ministair who owns a Grise Moor. We have not had a grice moor owning Prime Ministair since Lord Hume. It was traditional then that after ay got this poxy Queen’s Speech business ovair with, it’s the only part of the job which I realleagh hate, once it was ite of the way highever the Prime Ministair would invite one’s husband and one to his grise moor for a few days shooting. It made all this worthwhile.” (full post here)

… and from later in the speech the really significant part …

“Once we hev a Prime Ministair who owns a grise moor my government will repeal the legislation that bans foxhunting. Its jolly undemocratic you know, not one of my family agreed with it so how did it become law. Where is the democresay in thet? I know a lot of you think foxes are rather cute and cuddly, so from consideration for your feelings we tried hunting chavs but they are neither so quick nor cunning as foxes. Nobody complained but it was just not the same.”

Now originally we release the recording of The Queen (who sounded remarkably like Mrs. T. doing her impression of Maggie Smith in The Prime Of Miss Jean Brodie) but as it was hard to embed audio in this site at the time Boggart Blog readers had to make do with a text version. The podcast site disappeared and we lost track of our mp3 file.

We did not repost the file but it seems quite feasible that someone picked it up and interpreted it literally. So if you hear anyone accusing The Royal Family of satanism and cannibalism, just tell them it was Boggart Blog trying to raise a few laughs.

european elite
Europe’s elite enjoying the spectacle of a chav hunt

Naked Cyclists Are Revolting

It’s one way to grab a few headlines for your cause.

Thousands of naked cyclists in Mexico rode in protest over aggressive drivers and carbon emissions from cars.

Some 3,000 demonstrators – some bare head to toe, others in bathing suits or underwear – braved catcalls and embarrassed smiles from residents as they biked some 12 miles to end up in Guadalajara, the biggest city in Jalisco state.

In downtown Mexico City, nearly 2,000 bikers – naked or scantily clad – also demonstrated. Some slapped “fragile” stickers on their bodies or painted messages on their skin: “more bicycles, less pollution,” and “the city is for everyone, let bikes pass.”

Wonder what Jeremy Clarkson and his Top Gear mates would say about that.

And here for the unreconstructed blokes among Boggart Blog readers is a bit of nostalgia. The uncensored video of Queen’s Bicycle Racers.

http://www.liveleak.com/ll_embed?f=4e3576e915b6

The Queens Riddle – joke

An old joke reworked. There may be a few of these while the news is swamped with Maggie’s funeral.

The Queens Riddle

Worried about criticisms that his government was in disarray, Barack Obama came over to see the Queen, thinking the world’s longest serving leader. He said, “Yo’ Maj – bitch, how’d you run such an efficient gov’ment fo’ so long? Are there… any tips you can give me?”

‎”Well,” said the Queen, “the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people.” Obama frowned, and then asked, “But how do I know the people around me are really intelligent?”

The Queen took a sip of Earl Grey and answere. “Oh, that’s easy; you just ask them to answer an intelligent riddle. I’ll show you”

The Queen pushed a button on her intercom. “.Minion, Please send David Cameron in here”

A moment later Cammers walked into the room and said, “Yes, Your Majesty?”

The Queen smiled and said, “Answer me this please, Mr. Cameron. Your mother and father have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your sister. Who is it?”

Without pausing for a moment, Dave answered, “That would be me.”

“Yes! Very good, now fahk orf because the shine from your face is hurting one’s eyes.” said the Queen.

Obama went back home and asked Joe Biden, his vice president, the same question. “Joe, answer this for me. Your mother and your father have a child. It’s not your brother and it’s not your sister. Who is it?” “I’m not sure,” said Biden. “Let me get back to you on that one…” He went to his advisors and asked every one, but none could answer and all asked for time to consult with their advisers..

Finally, Biden ran into Sarah Palin out eating one night. The Vive President asked, “Sarah, can you answer this for me? Your mother and father have a child and it’s not your brother or your sister. Who is it?”

Sarah Palin answered back, “Lawks – a mercy Joe, I do declare that’s an easy one, it’s me!” (You notice thanks to Boggart Blog’s tireless research team we know SP moved to Alaska from the deep south)

Biden smiled, and said, “Thanks! Sarah, you’ve been a big help.” Then, he went back to Obama. “Say Barry, I had my best researchers work on that question you asked me and I have the answer. It’s Sarah Palin!”

Obama got up, stomped over to Biden, punched him in the face and angrily yelled, “No, you freaking idiot! It’s David Cameron!”

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One Has A Long Memory

The historic meeting between Her Maj and former IRA leader Martin McGuinness earlier today seemed to go well according to television news reports.

Television and video footage can be edited however and what we did not see was the bit where the Queen kneed McGuinness in the bollocks and said, “That’s for Uncle Louis, you twat.”

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The Real Queen’s Speech Redux

It is well known that every year HM The Queen writes her own speech for the state opening of parliament and that every year The Government goes to great lengths to ensure the draft is lost and Queenie has to read the speech prepared for her by the Prime Minister.

Last year one of Boggart Blog’s unseen reporters managed to obtain a copy of the original and we became the first journal ever to print the real Queens speech. Due to the stringent security in force at the palace now we have not been able to repeat the trick. We decided to reprint the 2008 speech to give you an idea of the kind of thing the Queen might like to have said tomorrow.

So here, exclusive to Boggart Blog is The Real Queens Speech.

MY LORDS LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, HONOURABLE MEMBERS, LET’S HAVE THE BEST OF ORDER NOW FOR DAME VERA LYNN, SORRY I MEAN THE QUEEN.

Loyal subjects, mai Government and Ay hev pleasure in in annincing our plans for the coming year.

Do you knay subject and lackeys, evereah yeah I hev to say all this shite about policies and plans? who writes this nonsense. Renewable energeagh, tax cuts, its the same evereagh yeah and nothing changes. If this is mai Government like what it is supposed to be, I’m heving mai ideas made law. I want something done abite the ban on fox hunting. And I don’t want that miserable fakker Brine as Prime Ministair anaygh mare, I quaite liked Bleagh, his ears were rartheagh amusing, they took on a life of their own when he became excited. But Brine is miserable, he hates Corgis and his wife does not hev a comedy mithe.

Nigh Ay’m the Queen and ay do not care for the way things are being done. Fairstleah, Ay want a proper Prime Ministair who owns a Grise Moor. We have not had a grice moor owning Prime Ministair since Lord Hume. It was traditional then that after ay got this poxy Queen’s Speech business ovair with, it’s the only part of the job which I realleagh hate, once it was ite of the way highever the Prime Ministair would invite one’s husband and one to his grise moor for a few days shooting. It made all this worthwhile. Young Cameron has potential and he looks laike the right sort of fellow, I imagine somebody in his famileagh owns a grise moor. So in the coming year mai government will introduce a law banning anybodaigh who does not own a grise moor from becoming Prime Ministair. Then Ay shall sack all you commoners and hold an election in which the boy Cameron and his chums have all the votes.

Once we hev a Prime Ministair who owns a grise moor my government will repeal the legislation that bans foxhunting. Its jolly undemocratic you know, not one of my family agreed with it so how did it become law. Where is the democrasay in thet? I know a lot of you think foxes are rather cute and cuddly, so from consideration for your feelings we tried hunting chavs but they are neither so quick nor cunning as foxes. Nobody complained but it was just not the same.

Finally, we shall encourage servility. Now that the service industry is the largest source of employment again it is time the pooah we reminded of their obligation to be servile. Forelock tugging will be de-rigeur and talking back to one’s betters will be a capital offence. We shall also revive for Corporate CEOs the Droit de Siegneur, Primae Noctis. The CEO of aneagh corporation worth more than ten billion pinds will hev the right to deflower any attractive totty to join his organisation on the evening of the day she starts work. Our entrepreneurs must be given incentives if the nation is to prospair.

Raight, that’s it, you can all fack orf, I’m gaying hame to watch Helen Mirren playing one. I do believe jug Ears is trying to bump one orf and I think he is planning to use Miss Mirren as a cover for the fact that ay am propping up a towerblock in a regeneration area. Litle Barstard, I wouldn’t put anything parst him these days.

President Rimmer Obama

Looking around American blogs today I see there is a kerfuffle about President O’s deep bow to the Emperor Of Japan. Typically the Politically Correct Thought Police are defending Obama. “What is wrong with showing respect for another nation’s customs,” they ask. Except a bow that deep would only be appropriate from a very low ranking Japanese to a highly ranked one.

As for respecting Japanese customs should Barry not first have respected the international protocol that heads of state do not bow to each other. Servants bow to Lords.

But at least it is not as bad as when O met the Kind Of Saudi Arabia. It is rumoured the US President not only bowed and genuflected (a total no-no) but kissed King Abdullah’s ring too. Perhaps we should start calling Obama President Rimmer.

No wonder Americans are pissed off. The President of “The Land Of The Free” is running round the world acting like a flunky – except to our dear old Queen of course – her groped her.

HMS Discovery: the BNP’s Election Battleship?

It seems the decision of The London Assembly to invite BNP councillor Richard Barnbrook to The Queen’s Buck House garden party was a bit of a faux pas especially as Barnbrook decided to take along as his guest BNP leader Nick Griffin.
About the only person who was pleased by this was Prince Phil the Greek who is absolutely delighted and is rumoured to have commented in private, “At last there will be somebody there with whom I can have a nice chat about wogs, coons and slitty eyed little yellow bastards.”

Palace officials are worried however that Her Maj may find it difficult to make small talk with Barnbrook and Griffin. Imagine:

Equerry: Richard Barnbrook and Nick Griffin Ma’m.
Queen: “Hello, it’s so nice to meet you, and what o you do?
BNP boys: “We’re racists Ma’m.
Queen: Really, how very interesting.

The officials need fear not. Although the pair are capable of turning the most vacuous banalities into propaganda Her Maj, who has spent a lifetime opening art galleries, museums, exhibitions, theatres and civic centres will be safe if she sticks to the arts. Richard Barnbrook you see is a film director who specialises in low budget art house movies. his best known film to date is titled HMS Discovery.

Despite the title it is not a film about life on one of the ships used in Captain Cook’s voyages of exploration or a ripping yarn about George Vancouver’s mapping expedition to the west coast of Canada. It is much more arty than that. Blurbs describe HMS Discovery as “a sensitive love story in which a group of men embark on a personal voyage to explore their sexuality.” The plot features full frontals of aroused men, scenes of al fresco sex, mutual masturbation, flagellation and bondage. If Her Majesty runs out of chat about all this surely she will find many topics to talk about with another old queen.

Some people have described HMS Discovery as “pure pornography.” Just shows how far people will go to discredit the BNP.

BTW, the leader of the ultra macho, head-shaving, West ~ham shirt wearing BNP is going to a party as the escort of a man who makes gay porn movies (oops pardon, I meant sensitive love stories.) What’s that all about?

More humour every day at Boggart Blog

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