Platfrom 2B Or Not 2B

Ye gods, what is the world coming to?

News at the weekend informs us that one examining board has included study of a tram timetable as part of the English Lit A Level.

(Funny, but we used to learn how to use timetables in Maths, at primary school, along with being able to work out mentally how long it would take five workmen to lay 5 miles of train track if it took one workman two days to build a brick wall, if you don’t believe me just check out any episode of Ask the Family.)

After my initial ‘dismayed of Tunbridge Wells’ moment though I think I can see how this might work.

Q1) “Platform 2b or not 2b, that is the question.”
(Shakespeare, Hamlet)

Referring to the text provided, Supertram, Timetable, May to November 2008, explain the dilemma facing Hamlet, his possible options and his musings upon these.

Q2) “A Brief Encounter” (Noel Coward) is set in a railway waiting room. With reference to the timetable provided, re-write the first scene with the action taking place at the University tram stop.

Q3) In The Great Gatsby, (F. Scott Fitzgerald,) the drama unfolds during a summer season in the Hamptons.
With reference to the text explain how the story could be different had Gatsby not owned the motorcar and had had to rely on public transport.

Yeah, there are possibilities there.

Environment friendly, human hostile railway travel.

This is not going to help encourage people to use public transport.

A passenger on a French train had to be rescued by firemen after having his arm sucked down the on-board toilet. The 26-year-old victim was trapped when he tried to fish out his mobile phone, which had fallen into the toilet bowl, and fell foul of the suction system. The high-speed TGV train had to stop for two hours while firemen cut through the train’s pipework. The man was carried away by emergency services, with the toilet still attached to his arm.

You might say life dealt him a shitty hand.

More humour every day from Boggart Blog

Electric Cars – Cheap At Half The Price

A new electric car, the Tesla, that appears to offer the breakthrough technology to provide clean, practical personal transport we have been waiting for since collectively falling off our chairs laughing at the Sinclair C5, was at last unveiled this week.

The Tesla, a two seater coupe, offers performance comparable with similar conventionally powered cars, will travel 250 miles on a charge – up and the batteries are reasonably environmentally friendly to manufacture and recycle.

It falls down in one important way though, the cost. At £90K ($150k approx after the collapse of the £ last week) it is hardly going to appeal to the Nissan Micra driver.

The government is studying a suggestion that it puts up some tax revenue to fund a research and development project aimed at reducing the costs of developing technologies that give the Tesla its technical lead to make the car competitive price wise. Reports say the scheme would cost the taxpayers a gobsmacking £100million.

Still, look at it in perspective, it’s cheaper than bailing out a couple of banks.

RELATED POST:
The Only Reason You Will Ever Need To hate The Toyota Prius Everything bad about electric and hybrid cars wrapped up in one model – with a few extras thrown in.

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Transport authorities in Brazil have finally caught up with a speed-loving driver who clocked up nearly £1m in fines, local media reported. Police intercepted the driver of a 12-year-old car in Sao Paulo at the spot he most frequently committed infractions. For 7 years he had been speeding and running red lights, but was not arrested earlier because the car was not registered in his own name. The car, which is understood to be worth about £3,000 would be auctioned if the driver did not pay the £900,000 in fines within 90 days.

You just have to love bureaucracy don’t you. It’s not the money for them, it’s the procedure. As if the guy is going to pay £900,000 to rescue and old banger.

More humour every day from boggart Blog.

We Speak The Truth …

People have tried to castigate both Boggart Blog and Machiavelli for calling our dear Labour Government a bunch of lying, conniving shits. I don’t know if any of those visitors are still looking at the blogs but if they are, perhaps they can explain something for us.
Every so often one of the lying, conniving shits will make a speech decrying the use of personal transport and exhorting us to use public transport as a means of getting mugged. No! I didn’t mean that, I meant to write “as a means of reducing pollution.”
I am therefore keen to hear from one of the lying, conniving shits an explanation of how this ties in with the above inflation rate fare increases on the railways and London Underground that are, according to the Minister for Transport, necessary to help combat overcrowding.
So creating more stealth taxes, increasing the rates we pay for services and generally increasing the cost of travel in a society engineered so that more and more travel is necessary (to get to and from work, the shops, hospitals, schools etc.) is the way to improve quality of life and save the planet is it?
Or maybe I’m missing the point and the truth is Government are just a bunch of lying, conniving shits.