The Best Man Won

Well it all went down to the wire in Abu Dhabi yesterday.

Amid myriad mathematical permutations of who would finish where or what each driver and their rivals had to do:- finish higher than fourth with the closest rival x places behind; have your legs waxed to save nano seconds by minimising the aerodynamic drag, – or maybe that was just Alonso’s attempt to show how hard he is, who knows, but hey, Fernando, us girls do it all the time, it’s no big deal:) – only one man really had his eye on the ball.

Asked what he needed to do to win the championship, the Crash Kid replied, “Go out and win the race.” and that is exactly what he did.

Lewis Hamilton put up a typically dogged fight, but laps stuck behind Robert Kubica’s Renault took their toll.

Fernando was also struggling to pass the yellow peril in front of him, but Viktor Petrov was driving the race of his life, well his F1 career did depend on it, and no matter how hard Alonso tried he just couldn’t make that passing manoeuvre.
Perhaps once again he was falling foul of his own ego as on the slowing down lap he could be seen alongside Petrov, shaking his fist at him.

No Fernando, you weren’t lapping him, you were racing for position. Your team-mate may have to give way but nobody else does, capisc?

Interestingly the commentators for the BBC came out with probably the year’s best contradiction in terms, coming out with the words, Alonso and supercool in the same sentence.

Mark Webber languished behind Alonso, unable to make any impression at all, whilst Jensen Button came home third in the race after yet another canny drive.

But it was Vettel’s race. Leading from pole, and re-claiming the lead as the pit stops shook out, the young German didn’t put a foot wrong, just got his head down and did what a world champion has gotta do, go out there and win the race.

At the end of a long season, you have to say the best man won, well once he’d stopped crashing into his team-mate that is.

Vettel Trips Over Lip

The F1 World Sulking Championship moved along to Hungary this week, throwing up a new contender for the title on the way.

Poor old Fernando Alonso, having been sulking almost continually for the last two months was unfortunately unable to get in a strop about anything.

He managed a creditable third on the grid ahead of his teammate Massa and remained remarkably cool to force his way past Webber and up into second by the end of the second corner.

Pitting early on in the safety car controlled period he maintained his position behind Vettel, but dropped to third as Webber elected to keep going.

As the safety car prepared to pull over, Webber tucked up nice and close behind it, Vettel appeared to be backing up the field, ready for the re-start, falling foul of the regulation that states the cars should be within ten car’s lengths of the safety car, but not even that could make Fernando lose his rag.

Vettel was duly called into the pits for a drive through penalty, leaving Fernando in second with an unassailable gap to Webber up ahead, and a dramatically diminishing gap to the hard charging Vettel.

As we all learnt long ago, apart from Fernando that is, it isn’t enough to be the fastest man on the track, you’ve also got to be able to pass the man in front, and if he isn’t part of your team there is no way he can be made to move aside to let you through.

So Vettel, who set lots and lots of fastest laps during the race, was stuck behind Fernando, and as Fernando knows only too well, the Ferraris are a bugger to pass.

Having to settle for third when obviously he was expecting a win, Vettel looked like he’d been sucking on a lemon for the entire race.
That man could scowl for Germany.
He ranted and raved, stuck his bottom lip out, slouched in his chair like an angry teenager, blamed everyone else except himself and stormed through to take the full 25 points in the Sulking Championship.

Rubens Barrichello used to do sulking, when he was younger and partnered with Schumacher at Ferrari.
These days, as The Stig’s Faster Brazillian Cousin, he does affable, laid-back, grand-old-man-of-the-sport.

Having been harrassing his former team mate for several laps Rubens finally made his move on lap 65, lunging down the right of Schumacher as they screamed down the pit straight.
Schumacher, who still does the villain of the piece best of all, took a good look in his mirrors and then calmly moved to the right, squeezing Barrichello up to the wall.
Rubens held his breath and his ground until the pit wall ended and he was able to take advantage of the pit lane exit to surge past Schumi.
I was quite surprised that on completing the passing manoeuvre RB didn’t stick his hand up out of the cockpit and make the universal gesture to show Schumi what a wanker he was.

Interviewed later Schumacher claimed it was all Barrichello’s fault, Schumi had moved across to the right because he was leaving loads of room for Rubens to pass on the left…