Evolution Classes In Junior School Could Be A Mistake

Following on from fatsally’s report a few weeks ago that the government planned to consult (cue portentous chords) “experts” about reforming the primary school curriculum we have now learned from our Whitehall worm that following the intervention of a group of leading biologists the blueprint for the new primary curriculum covering pupils aged 4 to 11 will include classes in evolutionary science.

It is well know scientists can be a tad obsessive about their subject (well OK, borderline autistic) but isn’t this pushing the evolution case a bit too far? Are primary school children ready for concepts like evolution and if not might its introduction at too young an age be counter productive? Darwin was 21 before he got into serious biology and it took him another twenty odd years before he got his head round the idea of evolution. And in his teens he was seriously into God. People can change so might it not be that teaching kids stuff in junior school will lead them to look at other ideas later?

And is there any point teaching something so complex to the unformed mind. We not most of the signatories of the evolution for infants petition are of the militant atheists. So why are they so keen to exploit the ideas of St. Ignatius Loyola, founder of the Jesuits. Give me the child to age seven and I will give you the man for life.” It might have worked in Iggy’s day when the Church controlled information but that was then, this is now and the internet is out there for everybody.

And what form will these lessons in evolutionary science take. Can you imagine asking your six year old “And what did you learn in school today?” and hearing the answer (in piping voice, “Well first teechur readed a story and that was nice, then we done some sums then we had playtime that’s my favourite lesson then we done some painting and crayoning and Charlie Boggis drawn a boat and then after dinner we done evolutionary science and that’s boring coz its about worms and frogs and teacher says dinosaurs never et cavemen and everyone knows they did coz they had big teeth…”

We Boggart Bloggers are all for evolution in fact the senior reporters have contributed to it but we still think pushing this kind of information at year three or four can only end in tears. Imagine how children so young will make sense of it.

“Now children, it’s time for our evolutionary science lesson. Last time we talked about how Chimpanzees and humans are descended from a common ancestor. It is very important to remember that. So Emma, where do chimpanzees come from?”

“Up a tree Miss.”

Johnny interrupts, “Mis, Miss, Miss…”

“Yes Johnny, what is it?”

“Dinosaurs eat Chimpanzees miss, I seen it in a cartoon.”

“No Johnny, dinosaurs do not eat chimpanzees, that is silly. Now Johnny as you seem to have a lot to say where do we humans come from?”

“He come from his house Miss, on the school bus this morning.”

“Thank you Emma, you all came from your houses this morning. Now Johnny, where do humans like you come from.”

“I come from my Mum’s front bottom Miss. I did coz I seen it on tele, this lady was on a bed with her feet in the air and she was swearing a lot bleeeep bleeep bleepettybleep and a baby head popped out of her front bottom.”

“Yes, very good Johnny but in evolutionary terms where do humans and Chimpanzees come from?”

“And the doctor said, “It’s a lovely little boy, and the lady’s partner said He ain’t mine you slapper he’s a ginge, there’s no ginger hair in my fambly or yours…”

“That’s enough Johnny. Anybody else, where do humans and chimpanzees start from? Yes Robbie?”

“My Dad said I got started in Benidorm Miss, I heered him telling Uncle Steve. But I never seen no chimpanzees in Benidorm when we was there last year.”

The militant atheist faction among the scientific community live in abject fear of creationism and that fear is responsible for prompting irrational and ill considered initiatives like this. My generation all had to sit through Religious Education in schools and we have made Britain the most irreligious nation in the world. In America laws governing separation of church and state forbid religious education in schools and the nation has become the hub of creationist thinking and Bible literalism. QED, leave things as they are and let children get into complex areas of science when they are ready.

Natural scepticism leads us to question and reject that which we are told is truth beyond questioning. Children are born sceptics. Ensure they are not indoctrinated and they will soon see fundamentalist religious thinking makes no sense at all. Start forcing fundamentalist science on them too soon and it will achieve the same end. I have always believed in evolution but it has never interested me much. I’m here because of it, but it was happening long, long before I was born and with a bit of luck will still be happening long, long after I am dead.

To be fair to some Americans I know, though they are members of creationist churches they will admit that maybe the Book of Genesis is a bit of an oversimplification but in the long run no matter what the origins of the Life, The Universe and Everything, it does not make a scrap of difference to our lives. We just have to muddle along through the chaos as best we can. How is the scientists irrational belief in logic, order and reason any crazier than the religionists belief in the divine?

When considering the views of scientists on education we should never forget science, like religion, can be learned by rote, only experience can impart wisdom.

jehovah’s Kiddie Fiddler

Darweinism At Work

News From The Girls School

A rather unsurprising admission from The Department of Education, Science and Silly Walks informs us that in the secondary school phase of education, which children embark on around the same time as they sprout hairs in funny places and drown in unfamiliar hormones, girls do better in single sex schools. It has been known for many years that at this point in their academic lives girls forge ahead of boys in terms of achievement but it now turns out that relieved of the stress of fighting off spotty little chavs who are only interested in getting inside their knickers girls do even better.

One of the first triumphs of Politically Correct Fascism was the almost total abolition of single gender education in the state sector. It was bad for children to be segregated by gender, reinforced sexist attitudes and condemned women to spend their lives barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen claimed the strident feminists as if co-education was wisdom handed down from the high towers of academia carved on tablets of LSD. Sharing classrooms with girls would help boys overcome their macho, testosterone fuelled tendencies and get in touch with their feminine side. Girls were not allowed to skip metalwork classes while boys were forced to study cooking and sewing. The male allies of the combat suit clad feminists in advancing this agenda were pasty – faced, matchstick thin academics who had formulated their theories, tested them and knew beyond doubt such an approach would work. Education must be approached scientifically if pupils full potential was to be achieved.

The co-educational approach has not worked.

Far from flourishing in the non – sexist, non – racist egalitarian atmosphere of co-ed schools the kids took over. Adolescent boys, already distracted by obsessing about the size of their willies, trying to delude themselves and their mates that the crop of dark specks on their chin were whiskers and not blackheads and hoping mum did not discover their pyjama pants had developed the ability to stand up unaided, were suddenly confronted by the most delightful, fascinating, frightening thing in the world. Girls.

Adolescence is a desperate stage in human development, no less so perhaps for girls than boys but I can only speak from personal experience. Every fourteen year old boy thinks every other boy in his class except the obligatory nerd is cooler than himself. So all the boys try very hard to be cool and only succeed in being even bigger dorks than they imagine themselves to be. At that age boys are also fearful that they are freaks because they have more / less body hair, bigger / smaller nipples or more and much more toxic zits that anyone else. And if they squeeze the zits the wound will fester and flies will lay eggs in it and the maggots will eat their brains and if they don’t squeeze the pustules their head will become a giant carbuncle and if they masturbate they will go blind / stammer / get zits / drain the fluid from their spinal cord and lose the use of their legs. They also worry about their trainers not being as good as anyone else’s, whether they will be ostracised if their mates find out mum only buys Rola Cola instead of The Real Thing and whether they might be gay because a guy in a pink shirt smiled at them.

On top of all this, plus the constant stress of trying to avoid Pignose Dimmock the school bully, in a mixed school they have to worry about keeping their end up (oops, pardon) in front of the girls. The average fourteen year old has no idea how to go about getting inside a girls knickers and even less idea about what to do if he does get there. That aside, the boys secretly find the idea of “doing it” as frightening as it is desirable. Everybody knows at that age vaginas have teeth and a game of hide the sausage with the class slut could be the nightmare that ends his dreams.

For girls the process is no easier. Diverted from the girlish business of excelling in class and dreaming up fiendishly cruel, non – physical ways of humiliating each other by the constant attention of strutting, posing little boys with permarections and by pretending they are having love affairs with thirty – five year old billionaires and are thus too sophisticated to ever bother with the spotty little oiks who are constantly trying to help with their cookery classes by putting a bun in the oven for them, the girls fail academically, get pregnant, end up as single parents trying to bring up three or four kids, all different colours in a near derelict house with mildew coloured walls on a forlorn sing estate where the “green spaces” have more dog turds than blades of grass.

Of course girls do worse in mixed sex schools as do boys. The only people who benefit from politically correct education policies are the ever expanding army of bureaucrats who administer it all.

A Clockwork GCSE Exam Paper
Mr Bollocks In The Cookery Class
Masturbation Canidate

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