The silly season is over without ever really getting started. While the war in Lebanon, climate change, terror plots that never were and the imminent fall of Tony Blair have hogged the news, all the man bites dog that can say “sausages” type stories have been sidelined.
The Boggart Blog inhuman resources department have not been idle however, we have a new recruit. Because Jenny Greenteeth can only travel through water and documents or magnetic media do not muck like water we have always had a problem in evidence for some of our reports. To help remedy this Jenny’s former boyfriend Soft Mick has joined us. Have you ever heard people, particularly in the north, when offered a bargain as in “hey they’re selling widgets half price down at the widget shop,” respond “I’ve got more widgets than Soft Mick.” The implication is that Soft Mick has more than he needs of everything. “Why so?” you might well ask.
Well Soft Mick is the airy spirit who nicks all those everyday objects that you just put down for a minute and when you go to pick them up, they’re gone.
“Where’s my effing screwdriver, I’m sure I put it right there a minute ago?” you say. Search as you might you never find that screwdriver. Alternatively, if you left the screwdriver in the middle of the table where you sit to eat your dinner every day it could quite possibly turn up right there several weeks later.
When things like that happen Soft Mick has been at work. Being a creature of pure energy he can slide under doors, through keyholes, even inbetween the cracks in the floorboards. And he can hop from one dimension to another very easily. Which explains the screwdriver mystery. It was always right where you thought you had left it, Mick had just popped it into the eleventh dimension.
Soft Mick is already working on his first assignment for Boggart Blog. Watch this space.