The Collapse Of British Culture

It has happened at last. The Daily Mail and Express have been predicting the event for fifty years and now it has slithered up and taken us all unawares. I’m talking about The Collapse Of All That Is Great In Britain of course, the event that lays waste to all we hold dear.

So what’s happened? you ask. I’ll tell you what has happened, be prepared to be shocked.

Last night as I watched the late news on BBC television the main presenter said, “And now for today’s sport starting with cricket.”

Immediately the camera cut away to a good looking woman reporter not reading from a cue card but speaking knowledgeably about cricket (or crikkit if you are from the same area as Geoffery Boycott,)

So what was happening in the crikkit? Honestly I don’t know, being transfixed by the reporter’s big blue eyes , playful smile, perfectly styled hair and the smart but rather severe suit she wore as a contrast to her soft sex appeal.

What have we come too when the BBC will employ not just any woman but a very fanciable woman to deliver the report on the last bastion of British male sexual repression. A million old farts will be in shock today. Poor old Geoffery Boycott will be thinking of killing himself just so he can turn in his grave.

A sexy female reporting on crikkit? The end of the world cannot be far away.

Anyone happen to know the reporter’s name by any chance? A phone number would be good too.

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17 thoughts on “The Collapse Of British Culture

    • As Burgess Meredith said in Rocky “Women weaken legs.” (I only know that because its on a T shirt that was next to the Live Long And Prosper one I was buying Dave for Christmas)

      And we don’t want our couch potatoes being to weak to get up every half hour and fetch another can from the fridge do we?

      As for good looking, intelligent and sporty, well Clare Balding is – mmmm – good loking to some I guess, intelligent, sporty and a screaming lezza. Gabby Logan is good looking but in a curiously forbidding way – the teeth I guess, Sue Barker like Barbie and Anthea Turner has no genitals and Kirstie Gallagher frightens me like Mrs Bibby my teacher in top infants did.


    • I’m intelligent and sporty, just back from 200 metres at the pool, playing golf tomorrow, captained the Engineer’s department fancy dress five-a-side football team and took the trophy, two consecutive years, then had to retire, being 7 months preggy.
      But I’m a tom boy:-(


      • Well as you are my sister I can’t comment on whwther you are good looking and sexy, that would be unhealthy.

        Anyway Dad decided you were a tom – boy, I don’t think you had much choice in the matter :))


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