Can Russia prevent China and India taking up arms against each other?

 

By Andrey Akulov, RT, 5 July, 2020

Can Russia prevent China and India taking up arms against each other?
India’s Border Security Force (BSF) soldiers stand guard at a checkpoint along a highway in Kashmir’s Ganderbal district June 17, 2020 © REUTERS/Danish Ismail

Andrey Akulov is a Moscow-based expert on military and conflict-related issues. He earned his degree at the Defense University and is also a graduate of the George C. Marshall European Center for Security Studies and NATO School (SHAPE).

The recent events at the India-China border have moved into the global media spotlight, with the two countries’ militaries becoming increasingly engaged in skirmishes and face-offs.

Attempts to capture chunks of land have actually become standard practice for the Chinese and Indian border guards deployed along the shared 3,400 km (2,100 mile) frontier since the 1962 war. No bullets have flown and no weapon systems have been used since 1975. In 1993, the two Asian giants signed an agreement on the “Maintenance of Peace and Tranquility,” also known as the Line of Actual Control (LAC) – a step forward on the way to deconfliction.

Somehow, the militaries have managed to resolve incidents at the local level, with both sides reaffirming their commitment to promoting good-neighborliness. Not any more. Fatalities were reported as the two sides clashed in mid-June against the backdrop of tensions, gradually mounting since early May. New Delhi and Beijing are blaming each other for violating the Line of Actual Control (LAC) that separates the forces in the Galwan Valle … Continue reading >>>

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<a href="https://originalboggartblog.wordpress.com/2019/12/28/leaked-email-senior-opcw-official-orders-delete-all-traces-of-dissent-on-douma-gas-attack-narrative/Leaked email: Senior OPCW Official Orders “Delete All Traces” Of Dissent On Douma Gas Attack Narrative
… The official narrative was designed to justify military intervention by US and NATO in Syria’s civil war, but western leaders were dissuaded fro, this course of action by Russia’s Putin and China’s President Xi. Later it was revealed that a minority report actually considered the facts, which pointed to the gas attack on Douma being a false flag attack carried out by forces attached to terrorist group Al Nusra.

Recall, too, that US Secretary of State John Kerry demanded last month, with typical haughtiness, for Russia to «bring Assad to the negotiating table». Not that there is much to discuss as far as Washington, London or Paris are concerned. Assad has to go, in their arrogant view, sooner or later.

Trump Threatens Putin, Assad Over Alleged Syrian “Chemical Attack”; Russia Warns Of “Grave” Response If US Launches Strike

It’s looks like deja vu all over again. Remember when the US Defence Secretary admitted the Syrian “Rebels” funded and armed by the USA have used chemical weapons
against government forces in Syria?

Or when earlier this year, now former Secretary of State Tillerson blamed Russia for an Alleged Syrian chemical attack despite admitting he doesn’t know who actually did it?
Or when the US finally admitted there was “no evidence” Assad used sarin gas?
Or just last week, when Trump said that the US is finally pulling out of Syria as a result of the defeat of ISIS (much to the Pantagon’s fury and open-ended timetable for extracting Syrian resources)?

Don’t Believe Mainstream Media: Russia Didn’t Attack US Troops in Syria
On February 16 Bloomberg published an article headlined: “Don’t Be Fooled: Russia Attacked U.S. Troops in Syria.” It was the start of the latest Russophobic shitstorm unleashed by the ‘liberals’ of mainstrteam media and social media in the USA against Russia. To give this story a little context, although under international law U.S. troops are …

Netherlands’ Lies Over Putin’s ‘Aggression’ Expose NATO War Agenda

Netherlands Prime Minister Mark Rutte, who can do without any geopolitical dramas because he leads a fragile coalition government, this week faced a vote of no confidence in the national parliament after his foreign minister finally came clean over a dangerous lie he has been telling for two years concerning Russian President Vladimir Putin.

Turkey, EU Exploit Syrian Refugee Crisis: Create New ‘Slave Trade’
So how is that deal between the EU and Turkey to control the flow of illegal immigrants into europe playing out. Well as expected Tutkeys gangster president is doing little to slow the tide, but like all blackmailers is making more demands. And the EU look like giving in; well what do the bureaucrats care, it’s only taxpayers money.

Patriotic Parties Rights Violated in European Parliament
The democratic rights of patriotic parties in the EU parliament are constantly violated, Belgian MEP Frank Creyelman said on Friday. “It is very difficult for patriotic parties to work in the EU parliament as their democratic rights are violated constantly,” Creyelman from the Vlaams Belang party said.

Total Opacity Of ‘The Most Transparent Administration Ever’
The US Freedom of Information Act, like its British equivalent, requires a response within 20 business days, but government departments easily sidestep that deadline by replying with a non committal acknowledgement.It’s what bureaucrats do; when dealing with government departments in my role as a business consultant I would lay out my problem, followed by my suggested solution and conclude by saying if I had not received their reply within seven working days I would assumed they agreed with what I was proposing and go ahead …

Soros Encourages Obama Administration To Further Interference In Ukraine
While western leaders continue to pose as the guys with white hats in the confrontations with Russia and China, hacker collective CyberBerkut has leaked some hacked documents which show Russia is not behind the escalation of provocation, but the guys in black hats who really run western governments, led by George Soros.

US Presidents Of The Past warned Against Secret, Shadow Government.
By now it should be obvious that peacemake, joybringer and putative aquatic pedestrian Barack Hussein Obama was never really in charge of the US Government. Whatever Obama said would happen, all the American government’s policies ensured the opposit would happen. The embedded article thows some light on how the US government really works

Teacher Forced To Resign For ‘Sharing’ Material Critical Of Obama And His Beloved Muslim Terrorists
The supporters of the wannabe King of the American Empire like to describe themselves as ‘liberal’, ‘progressive’, and left wing. If they were really any of those things they would not be as fanatically committed to the idea of suppressing free speech as they are.


Libya, Syria, Yemen: Sectarian conflict threatens entire Middle East

Another failure of US foreign policy leads to threat of war as a coalition of 10 Sunni Arab states launches a military offensive against Shiite Houthi militants in Yemen, recently proclaimed by America’s president as a brilliant example of war on terror, but now catapulting the Middle East into the inferno of battle.

US Becoming Isolated As Key Ally Japan Considers Joining China-Led Investment Bank
Japan’s foreign minister signaled cautious approval of the institution that the United States has warned against. The opposition to the AIIB began crumbling after Britain said earlier this month that it would join the institution, saying it was in its national interest. France, Germany and Italy swiftly followed suit.

The World Rejects USA Attempt To Manipulate Venezuela
Last week, President Obama signed an executive order declaring a “special state of emergency,” saying that the situation in Venezuela represents an extraordinary danger to U.S. interests and foreign policy.It is all total bollocks of course, for resons that are not entirely clear, Washington has decided that Venezuela will be the next nation to be destabilised in pursuit of the U.S. global hegemony agenda.

Venezuela’s Maduro given executive powers to face U.S. ‘imperialism’
We have learned via Reuters news feed that Venezuela’s National Assembly on Sunday (15 March) voted Sunday to grant President Nicholas Maduro powers to rule by decree in defense and security affairs amid an escalating confrontation with the US Government in Washington. The special powers were approved by a show of hands in the assembly after two hours of debate …

Venezuelan Social Movements Take to the Streets to Oppose U.S. Aggression
And now, with the security situation more dangerous that any time in the past fifty years, the peacemaker and joybringer, Barack Hussein Obama, The Obamessiah, is looking to start yet another civil war and plunge another nation into failed statehood. This time, as we reported a few days ago, his target is Venezuela

Warmonger Obama Goes Looking For Another War, In Venezuela This Time
The Obama Administration, which in 2009 provided backing for the coup that overthrew the progressive democratic President of Honduras and put into power a junta of oligarchs; a rerun as it turned out for the bloody coup that replaced the corrupt but democratically elected Ukrainian President Viktor Yanukovych, ad installed in Kiev a rabidly anti-Russian, equally corrupt, right wing extremist Government …

Warmonger Obama Goes Looking For Another War, In Venezuela This Time
The Obama Administration, which in 2009 provided backing for the coup that overthrew the progressive democratic President of Honduras and put into power a junta of oligarchs; a rerun as it turned out for the bloody coup that replaced the corrupt but democratically elected Ukrainian President Viktor Yanukovych, ad installed in Kiev a rabidly anti-Russian, equally corrupt, right wing extremist Government …

Germany Alarmed by Aggressive NATO Stance On Ukraine
As the US pro war rhetoric pumps up the tensions between Russia, its allies and the west in Ukrain we revisit once more the truth about which world power has been relentlessly pushing for war since 2009. It isn’t Russia or China, though they are not likely to back down.

OSCE saw no military hardware, weaponry crossing from Russia to Ukraine – mission head
One American attempt to raise worldwide support for military intervention in Ukraine was an allegation that US spy satellites had photographed Russian military convoys heading across the border into territory held by Ukrainian separatist rebels.
When challenged to provide proof the US government showed us some pictures so fuzzy and indistinct

Soros Encourages Obama Administration To Further Interference In Ukraine
While western leaders continue to pose as the guys with white hats in the confrontations with Russia and China, hacker collective CyberBerkut has leaked some hacked documents which show Russia is not behind the escalation of provocation, but the guys in black hats who really run western governments, led by George Soros.

Russia, Ukraine and the Petrodollar

Italian Politician Demands Bill Gates Arrest For Crimes Against Humanity

Via GreatGameIndia.com,

As the FDA shuts down a Bill Gates-funded COVID-testing program, an Italian politician has demanded the arrest of Bill Gates in the Italian parliament.

Sara Cunial, the Member of Parliament for Rome denounced Bill Gates as a “vaccine criminal” and urged the Italian President to hand him over to the International Criminal Court for crimes against humanity.

She also exposed Bill Gates’ agenda in India and Africa, along with the plans to chip the human race through the digital identification program ID2020.

As reported by GreatGameIndia earlier, in 2015 it were the Italians who exposed secret Chinese biological experiments with Coronavirus. The video, which was broadcast in November, 2015, showed how Chinese scientists were doing biological experiments on a SARS connected virus believed to be Coronavirus, derived from bats and mice, asking whether it was worth the risk in order to be able to modify the virus for compatibility with human organisms.

In an extraordinary seven-minute speech met with wide applause, Sara Cunial, the Member of Parliament for Rome said that Italy had been subjected to a “Holy Inquisition of false science.” … Continue reading >>>

Science * Technolgy menu
Pandemic of pandemics

Western Nations Are Not The Only Ones Having Problems With Islam

Late last month the European Court of Justice (ECJ), an offshoot of the Cultural Marxist empire known as the European Union ruled that a woman who had referred to Mohammed, the prophet of Islam as a paedophile was guilty of blasphemy under Sharia Law it was the most abject, snivelling surrender yet by any western government or judiciary to the bullying and threats of fanatical Muslim hate preachers. Sharia Law has no standing in any non Muslim nation, what’s more it is a barbaric medieval legal codex that imposes sentences of death and torture for trivial offences.

The waily, gnashy – teethy snowflakes who are stupid and emotionally needy enough to believe if we are tolerant of Muslin intolerance we can somehow show them our way is best, refuse to accept that Islam poses any threat to civilised nations. The still insist that the grooming and rape gangs given licence by politically correct politicians in Britain to abuse vulnerable young women is ‘Fake News’ dreamed up by right wing extremists, in spite of two separate independent reports by sociologists finding failings on the part of police, government officials and politicians had allowed the crimes to go uninvestigated and the perpetrator unpunished.

Such people, who claim our culture is enriched by third world criminals, want government to encourage more mass migration form the third world shitholes, and to spend huge fortunes on persuading them to integrate into British society perhaps need to read this article on the problems large Muslim minorities cause, from a nation where an Islamic minority has existed for a thousand years and still has not integrated.

via barenakedislam.com

When India gave up a large chunk of its land to Muslims in order to create Pakistan in 1947, it should have mandated that all Muslims residing in India move to Pakistan

That’s why now, India is having the same problems with their Muslim population that every country with a Muslim minority is experiencing. However, in India, the Muslim minority is nearly 180 million and they are constantly whining that Prime Minister Narenda Modi’s (photo right) India has become a living nightmare for them. How long before India will be forced to give up more of its land to appease the squeaky wheel Muslims? As everyone knows, that is their goal – to create an Islamic state within the Hindu nation, with the ultimate long-term goal of taking over the whole country one day.

READ ALL >>>

  More on Islam

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Dutch professor: “Western countries have never managed to integrate Muslims”
Dutch professor of sociology Ruud Koopmans has carried out a 20-year research project embracing several large scale studies on integration and assimilation, and at the end of it all he concludes that Muslims are more difficult to integrate than other migrant groups.

India And Pakistan: Inching Toward Their Final War?

Sourced from an article by Mohammed Ayoob

india pakistan conflict
The forgotten nuclear powers, India and Pakistan are edging towards war (Image source: LA Times)

India and Pakistan are the nuclear powers mainstream media tends to forget as they focus on USA, Russia, China and North Korea, but both have between 120 and 140 nuclear warheads, probably not equipped with the latest guidance and stealth technology, but good enough to do a lot od damage according to the Arms Control Association. A report published in 2015 by the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace and the Stimson Center claims that Pakistan may be outpacing India in terms of its nuclear stockpile, and may possess 350 nuclear warheads within the next five to ten years. A 2016 SIPRI report also concluded that Pakistan now has more nuclear warheads than India.

However, what should most concern us about the nuclear-weapons policies of the neighbouring states is not the size of the stockpiles, but their radically different nuclear doctrines.

The major difference between the two countries’ nuclear doctrines is that while India has renounced first use of nuclear weapons, Pakistan has refused to do so by reserving its right to use nuclear weapons in the face of India’s conventional superiority.

So far aroundthe uncertainty Pakistan’s nuclear capabilities is preventing a major conflagration in South Asia. Pakistan’s refusal to reject first use, and its emphasis on building stockpiles of tactical nuclear weapons and short-range missiles can be explained in light of its conventional-force inferiority. It is in fact a mirror image of the American nuclear doctrine as applied to central Europe during the Cold War. The United States refused to disavow first use of nuclear weapons, and deployed tactical nuclear weapons in central Europe on a large scale, because of NATO’s presumed inferiority in terms of conventional power against that deployed by the Warsaw Pact.

But for Pakistan, the uncertainty introduced by its nuclear doctrine has delivered a bonus. The nuclear threat provided Pakistan with the shield behind which terrorist groups armed and trained by Islamabad, such as Lashkar-e-Taiba and Jaish-e-Muhammad, can engage in casing havoc not only in Indian-administered Kashmir but also in other parts of India. The fear of provoking a nuclear response from Pakistan has prevented India from retaliating to these provocations, use of its superior conventional forces to inflict a crushing defeat on Pakistan.

India did not retaliate even when a massive terrorist operation launched from Pakistan targeted India’s financial capital, Mumbai, in November 2008. This attack lasted for more than sixty hours and left at least 174 people dead.

However, it seems that the logic of this deterrence is fast eroding. Attacks such as the one in Mumbai, and subsequent assaults on Indian military installations in Kashmir and elsewhere, have also provided justification for India’s hard-line Hindu nationalists to whip up support for a military response, thus putting pressure on the Indian government to abandon its policy of diplomatic responses. In the past few months, Indian retaliatory attacks have targeted not only terrorist bases but also Pakistani military facilities, causing significant casualties among Pakistani forces.

The escalation in the last two years in terror attacks, especially by Jaish-e-Muhammad, on Indian military targets in Kashmir and surrounding Indian states has made the situation very perilous. In the past several months, terrorist groups operating from Pakistan with the complicity of the government and military authorities have undertaken several major attacks, causing significant loss of life in India.

A major attack on the Uri camp in Jammu and Kashmir in September 2016, left seventeen military personnel dead and shocked the Indian government into reassessing its strategy in response to such attacks. On September 29, 2016, India launched a “surgical strike” against terrorist bases in Pakistan. Although there has been speculation that India conducted similar strikes before that, it was the first time Delhi indicated publicly that it was ready to launch major retaliatory attacks against targets in Pakistan and Pakistan-occupied Kashmir.

In the latest incident, in February 2018, Jaish terrorists attacked an Indian military camp in Jammu; five army personnel and four militants were killed. In retaliation, the Indian army destroyed a Pakistani army post with the help of rocket launchers, killing, according to Indian sources, twenty-two Pakistani personnel. This tit-for-tat exchange is reaching dangerous proportions.

The Pakistani military tends to downplay Indian incursions and retaliatory attacks, while bigging up their own, and true to form they refused to recognize the seriousness of the escalating cross border violence, mainly because it does not want to appear weak in the eyes of the Pakistani public which has a culture of honour and revenge, and is likely to clamor for retribution. However, as more and more Pakistanis get internet access the military cannot continue to downplay Indian attacks, or increasing fatalities. There is the danger that at some point, either by miscalculation or by design, an Indian surgical strike in Pakistani territory will push the Pakistani military to retaliate in force.

Is World War Three Really Kicking Off This Time?
The airstrikes by a US led coalition that killed many Syrian soldiers fighting for the legitimate government of Bashar al Assad against the terrorist forces of ISIS has raised the level of hostile rhetoric between the USA / NATO coalition and the Russia / China / Iran alliance. The likelihood of war seemed to have receded through the summer, after it seemed possible early this year, that one stray shell or bullet could spread the war beyond the middle east.

Only 5 Percent Of Russian Air Strikes Hitting Islamic, British Defence Secretary Lies
After an amazing outburst from the delusional Brack Obama left the United Nations General Assembly in stunned silence because Obama has accused Russia and China of all the recent breaches of international law of which the USA is demonstably guilty, the propaganda departments of western governments seem to have totally lost their grip on reality.

Have US tactics only helped to make ISIS more powerful?/b>
We have questioned the US led efforts to defeat ISIS in the middle east many times, pointing out that every time the western alliance steps up opposition to the establishment of a news Islamic Caliphate, Islamic State seem to get stronger. ‘Conspiracy Theorists’, our critics yell. So let’s look at opinion from around the world that concurs with ours.

EU and US talk of war with Russia

The European People’s Party (EPP) the largest political group in the European Parliament, nominated Luxemourgeois nonentity and alcoholic (allegely) Jean-Claude Juncker as President of the European Commission. The party has the support of some of Europe’s most powerful leaders, including German Chancellor Angela Merkel. Made up largely of centre Social Democrat parties and centre right Christian Democrats they command an automatic majority in any vote taken by the European Parliament and are unerringly federalist, globalist and anything but democratic.

And they are unerringly supportive of America’s efforts to start a war with Russia.

“The time of talk and persuasion with Russia is over,” MEP and Vice-President of the European People’s Party (EPP) Jacek Saryusz-Wolski told a meeting of the European Parliament on Tuesday, 21 April, “Now it’s time for a tough policy, a realistic policy, and concentration on defence and security, because the eastern flank of the EU feels vitally, existentially threatened.”
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EU and US talk of war with Russia

The Difference In Voting For Hillbillary or Trump Is Only One Promises War With Russia
Essential reading for our american readers who must soon decide who they want as their next president. Important too for non Americans who cannot influence the outcome of the election but are entitled to know why their arses might be blown from here to eternity sometime in the next few years.

Has Everybody Forgotten Obama’s War
The American military machine has just chalked up the grim statistic of its 2,000th fatality since America troops first surged into Afganistan to defeat “insurgents” whose families had lived in that country for many generations. The invasion was justifed in the aftermath of September 11 by the myth that Afghanistan was a …

Just How Close Are We To World War Three
Have you read or heard in your news supplier of choice of the recent massive troop movements in Israel, the massive build up of British, French and American warships around the approaches to the Persian gulf or just how badly the situations in Egypt and Libya have deteriorated since …

Ignore The warmongering Left’s Calls For Intervention In Syria

Morons to the right of me, idiots to the left. What are us libertarians to do as we find ourselves in our customary position, clinging to a raft of common sense as we try to navigate a course through a sea of insanity. My stance on the trouble spots of the middle east has always been the same, firmly non interventionist and I am not shifting as the propaganda …

Obama Talks The Talk But Dare Not Visit Afghanistan In Daylight

Todays mainstream news papers and broadcast bulletins are full of the Superhero Barack Obama’s daredevil visit to Afghanistan. The man who liberated Libya single handed and took out Osama Bin Laden (or a Pakistani pensioner with a beard) in a daring solo raid behind enemy lines stormed into the Afghan capital, Kabul, made a speech that left hundreds of Taliban fighters dead and saw others fleeing for the mountains with their arses on fire then left again all in the space of …

Syrian Rebels Say West Is Already Aiding Thier Uprising.

The mainstream media are all agog today over something The Daily Stirrer and other libertarian blogs have been telling you for weeks. There are already western military personnel on the ground in Syria, aiding the uprising against the government of President Assad.Western powers have been providing military support and equipment to the Syrian rebel fighter, one of …

Flight MH17 – a little common sense amid the politics

sam missile launcherSurface to air missile launcher – Ukranian military have them and men trained to use them. The East Ukraine separatists are nutters who are still trying to work out how to throw a Molotov Cocktail.

Looking for common sense on the Ukraine Malaysia Airlines downing I found in a Times Of India article the views views of experienced airline pilot Jaideep Banerjee. Veteran passenger flight commander Banerjee has come up with a pretty simple rule of thumb. He has told The Times of India’s reporter that civilian aircraft should avoid flying over any area that has a strong presence of UN Peace Keeping Forces.

“We are not dealing with Naxalites here. The rebels and militia in these areas are equivalent to state actors who have brute weaponry. Billions of dollars that Somali pirates get through ransom from hijacking ships is ploughed into the arms industry. What happened to Malaysia Airlines flight MH17 is unbelievable but true. We are now vulnerable and need to do everything possible to stay out of harm’s way,” Mr. Banerjee said.

Which is exactly what Boggart Blog (and anyone else with a smidgin of intelligence) was saying yesterday.

Trouble is the world is led by people who love and are addicted power and see war as a path to power. So while the decisions they make may seem insane to us, they are quite rational to the power elite’s warped world view.

The latest we have from the elite insane asylum is this via Reuters:

REUTERS – UKRAINE’S COUNTER INTELLIGENCE CHIEF SAYS HAS “COMPELLING EVIDENCE” THAT CREW OF “THIS SYSTEM” (BUK-1 MISSILE SYSTEM) WERE RUSSIAN CITIZENS.

Really? how could they know that? Presumably Ukrainian intelligence staff were not at the launch site taking note or filming events on their smart phones.

My guess is they got the information from the US Government or the CIA. Which means of course the evidence is as compelling as that which ‘proved’ the poison gas attract in Syria was launched by Assad’s troops. Funny how that story went quiet when real evidence emerged that the atrocity had been a US/Israeli false flag event.

Or maybe even as compelling as the evidence that Saddam Hussein’s regime in Iraq had Weapons of Mass destruction that threatened the west and gave another US President and another set of European arse lickers an excuse to start a war.

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Flight MH17 – this is very interesting


Whatever War Crimes Obama Accuses Russia Of You Can Bet America Has done It First.

World policitical leaders and media sycophants are lining up to condemn Russia for the dowing on Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17 over Ukraine. Here are a few snippets from our coverage:

Journalistic Standards down The Pan

Many news channels in India ran a story yesterday on the death of Bollywood star KANAKA, from cancer.

By the evening new bulletins however Kanaka was on TV declaring that reports of her death had been greatly exaggerated. The star said that during an interview for a syndicated news agency she confided to the journalist that she had undergone tests for cancer but hadf been given the all clear.

Now this means either Kanaka has landed a part in the Indian Version of The Walking Dead, or, reassuringly, it isn’t just our celebrity obsessed news media that has let standards slip.

Indian Minister Accused Of Abusing A Young Man With A Shoelace

Gauri Shankar Bisen, a minister in the government of the Indian State Madhya Pradesh, has eaten elephan dung, publicly disembowelled himself and offered to resign after admitting that he was guilty of shoelace related abuse after having a young student tie his shoes for him on as he awaited the start of an event in the state.

Unfortunately the paps wrere on hand to photograph the incident and newspapers carried pictures of the pair in a pose not unlike the one Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky found themselves in some years ago.

The Minister was at first defiant, insisting “I did not have shoe related fun with that student.

The student – who Bisen said was aged 18 making it legal – was later seen retying the laces again laces as the minister talked to dignitaries. Mr. Bisen refused to comment on the nature of certain dubious stains on his shoes.

shoe-lace_2117005b“I did not have shoe related fun with that student.”

Indian marathon runner beats age barrier

Big news on the less serious online news pages today concerns the amazing feat (or feet) of the hundred year old guy from India who completed a full twenty six and a bit mile marathon in Toronto.

Now how about that for overcoming the decrepitude that comes with advancing years. One hundred years old and he ran further than most men half his age could manage.

What the news reports did not tell us of course is he was only 35 when he set off.

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Just when you thought it was safe to get back in your deack chair

Reverse Midas

You can always rely on Gordon Brown. More than any other Labour chancellor he has the reverse Midas touch. Everything he does turns to shit.

Since Gordon, desperate for revenue to underwrite his burgeoning public sector deficit, decided to sell off Britain’s god reserves not only has the price of gold quadrupled but the major trading nations (China and India) having lost confidence in the pound and dollar, are once more doing business in gold. The interest on our nation’s debts has to be paid in gold and thanks to Gordon we ain’t got none and so are at the mercy of a market n which the people who own the gold we must buy to pay our debts are the people we owe money to.

All together now, Gordon is a moron, Gordon is a moron.

Cow Urine Cola: In India It’s the weeal thing:

In India they’ve done what? They haven’t have they?
They surely have. In India you will soon be able to drink a refreshing cola beverage made from cow’s urine.

We know some parts of the world have serious shortages of fresh water but we never knew things were this bad.

The Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh, India’s leading Hindu cultural group, claims it has developed Gau Jal or Cow Water, a cola flavoured drink, and hopes it will be marketed as a ‘healthy’ alternative to Coke and Pepsi.

Hindus worship cows as a symbol of the mother and thus milk and dairy products have almost sacred status. Many devout Hindus, apart from drinking milk and eating dairy foods also consume bovine urine drinks for their “health-giving” properties. As far as we know there are not the same Hindus who like to knock back a glass of their own wee first thing in the morning. If they are then it starts to seem a bit fetisistic.

In some parts of India, cow dung and urine are sold in regular dairy shops alongside milk and yogurt, and “ayurvedic” Indian health food companies make porridge, toothpaste and tonic drinks which claim to cure ailments ranging from liver complaints to diabetes and cancer. Krishna only know what kind of alments they my cause. Cow’s urine is also believed to have disinfectant properties.

Now the Cow Protection Department has invented a new urine-based soft drink it hopes the product will promote the health-giving properties of cow piss to a wider market. “We refer to gau ark (cow urine) as gau jal (cow water) as it has immense potential to cure various diseases. We have developed a soft drink formula with gau jal as the base and it has been sent to a laboratory at Lucknow for testing,” said director Om Prakash (sounds like a joke name to us but hey, we only report the news.).

The product support team are now working on packaging, marketing, and of course preservation to stop its curative drink from going whiffy in the summer heat.

“It will be a revolution of sorts. The acceptance of cow urine as a potent medicine is increasing day by day and once it comes as a cold drink, its demand will definitely increase. It will prove and justify the high stature accorded to a cow in Indian culture.” added the enthusiastic Om.

Now I remember where I have heard of Om before. He was the god who visited the discworld in the form of a tortoise and was almost eaten alive when someone mistook him for a pie in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld novel Small Gods. Fact is indeed stranger than fiction.

Read the full story: India makes cola from cow’s urine at The Daily Telegraph.

More humour every day on Boggart Blog